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    amijain's Avatar
    amijain Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 28, 2007, 03:16 AM
    Marrying a gril whose mothers surname is same as my mothers
    I am jain, I love one girl from our caste ,her mothers family surname and my mothers family surname is same?

    Now I was was not knowng her until I met her , she is not related to me , yet everyone is sayng it will be like brother sister marriage! Also people talk about genetic problems due to blood relation . We don't know in which generation we were related ! So how can we be relatives? The test for genetics is very painful! We are not first and second cousins!
    Or is there really a problem in genes !please help me out
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
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    #2

    Apr 28, 2007, 10:03 AM
    Jain, who is telling you this silly nonsense? That is absolutely absurd. Someone is having a good laugh at your expense. Do not listen to them. They are being very rude to you both.

    If you cannot find any close relatives that you both have in common, you are not related. I know so many people with the last name of Singh. I am sure you do too. Are they all closely related? No.

    If you eventually find some relatives somewhere in your family history that are related, you will find that the relation is so distant, it won't make any difference. You are not brother and sister. You are not first or even second, cousins. So, go and feel free to court this girl. Be happy. May you both fall in love and someday be married with all the blessings of your families backing you. :)
    gypsy456's Avatar
    gypsy456 Posts: 319, Reputation: 48
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    #3

    Apr 30, 2007, 05:13 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by amijain
    i am jain, i love one girl from our caste ,her mothers family surname and my mothers family surname is same?

    now i was was not knowng her untill i met her , she is not related to me , yet everyone is sayng it will be like brother sister marriage! also people talk about genetic problems due to blood relation . we dont know in which generation we were related ! so how can we be relatives? The test for genetics is very painful! we are not first and second cousins!
    or is there really a problem in genes !please help me out
    So your family is not related... you love her... she loves you... so you have the same last name but are not related... don't let other people drive you crazy..
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #4

    Apr 30, 2007, 05:15 PM
    I agree with Ruby, and I also believe you have some good answers here.

    Understand that it is not necessary to post the same question twice, you will most likely get the same answers.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #5

    Apr 30, 2007, 05:48 PM
    Yes, someone is either uneducated about these things, or just making a joke to make you upset. Merely having a last name the same does not make people related. Having the same relatons make you related.

    Also to be honest even at 1st cousins, research ( and it scares me people research this stuff) there is only a small chance of any problem, and by the time you get to 3rd cousins there is really no noticeable increase of a problem.

    So if your moms sisters and brothers, or their childred or their children's children are not related to your girl friend, you are not related to her in any way that makes any difference. People with the same last name marry all the time, they just have the same last name, nothing more, nothing else.

    But with that said, what do you mean that DNA tests are "painful" they take a swab of your mouth, use the root from a hair, or take a simple blood test. ( taken in the US in many states to get married anyway ** again here in the US) DNA tests are simple and don't hurt at all.

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