How To Confront A Lying Spouse
Asked Dec 12, 2007, 10:17 AM
My husband has been lying to me about how much money he actually has. I know I was wrong, but because I don't trust him at all (past affair and other lies-too many to mention), I did snoop and found in his wallet, more money than he told me he had. I even gave him a second chance to come clean when he called me from work today, and he lied again! This is NOT the first time he's lied to me about money and other things. I have NO TRUST for him at all, but I'm a Christian and trying to put all my trust, cares and worries on God! It's hard! I don't know what to do!! IF I tell him how I know he's lying, I'd have to admit my own act of dishonesty by snooping through his wallet. Then, he'd use that and switch it all around on me without admitting HIS wrong! I would not snoop, had there not been past issues with him lying to me about numerous things! I'm so insecure with him. If he lies to me about money, had an affair already, etc. WHAT ELSE IS HE LYING TO ME ABOUT?! HELP!!
P.S. Whenever I talk to people in my church, they tell me to trust God to work on him and that separation and divorce is not an option (unless there is continual cheating or abuse). I don't know what else to do! He is a decent man who I know loves me and my kids to death and I know that he'll do anything for us, but I can't stand living with him with all of this insecurity and fear of him cheating on me again and lying to me about everything! I don't know what to believe and I feel I always have to check his phone and question everything! But I've learned that the more I question him, the more defensive and upset he gets and the more he'll lie! Please tell me something to do!