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    joesgirl's Avatar
    joesgirl Posts: 4, Reputation: 0
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 23, 2008, 05:48 PM
    Engaged and my mother-in-law to be is telling lies
    My fiance's mother is being a total be she told my fiancé that I was going out with someone behind his back and I'm not I would never do that to him he is my everything and my world I love him to death why would I cheat on him anyway I can't confront his mom because he doesn't want her to know I know what should I do
    MsMewiththat's Avatar
    MsMewiththat Posts: 854, Reputation: 136
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    #2

    May 23, 2008, 06:22 PM
    Okay if there is no cheating that you have every right to be upset. ARe you confident that Joe isn't playing games with you? Sometimes it's easier to say someone else said something that you are questioning yourself. Do this, if you want, ask him to ask her details of how she knows this and let him know this really bothers you. Take it seriously and get to the bottom of it. I can understand you not wanting to betray his trust by saying something to her yourself. But address the accusation. Is it possible that he doesn't want you to mention it to her because she didn't say it?
    danielnoahsmommy's Avatar
    danielnoahsmommy Posts: 2,506, Reputation: 297
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    #3

    May 23, 2008, 06:24 PM
    Forget about what was said. You will soon be a member of this family. Do you really want to be? Think hard very little if anything will change
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
    Software Expert
     
    #4

    May 23, 2008, 11:02 PM
    So far, everyone is right. You can force a confrontation now or you can just ignore it. Both are perfectly legitimate responses. You have to decide based on your temperament.

    If it were me, and my guy wouldn't defend me, I would seriously consider putting everything on hold.

    I also might consider going to the mother personally and calmly asking to be shown the evidence she has to be speaking so evilly behind your back. When she can produce none, or if she simply refuses to offer any, remind her that simple allegations within the family can do permanent damage. Even false ones.

    For instance, you would hate to have to hear rumors in the family about her drug usage, or gambling addiction, or the time you secretly had to get her out of jail and swore to keep it a secret.

    Of course, those things are no more true than the falsehood she's told about you, but wouldn't it be just awful to have to live with those things in the air?

    Hopefully she will get the point. Request politely that she consider admitting to your fiancé that she was mistaken and apoligize. After all, you'd hate to having to convince your husband that you all needed to move 3000 miles away and take all her future grandchildren with you.

    Then give her a hug, and let her know that her son and her grandchildren will have the best wife, strongest mother anyone could hope for... and you're looking forward to being fast friends with her for years to come.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    May 24, 2008, 07:18 AM
    Forget what she says, its irelevant, and your husband knows the truth. I like what JB said, love her to death, and go out of your way to show how much you love your husbands' mama!

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