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Friday again!
Space Monkeys
NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an astronaut. They trained them for months. Then when they thought they were ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready to send them up into space. As the moment came closer NASA's mission control center announced, "This is mission control to Monkey One. Initiate!" At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle's engines ignited and the shuttle took off. Two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, "This is mission control to Monkey Two. Initiate!" At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle separated from the empty fuel tanks. Another two hours later mission control announced, "This is mission control to the astronaut..." At this the astronaut responded "I know, I know. Feed the monkeys and don't touch anything." Top Ten Things That Men Understand About Women 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. Hemlsman Training A young man who wants to see the world signs on to a steamship to be trained as a helmsman. He masters the classroom instruction, then starts his practical training on the wheel of the vessel. In his first lesson, the mate gives him a heading, and the young fellow holds to it. Then the mate orders, "Come starboard." Pleased at knowing immediately which way starboard is, the young man leaves the helm and walks over to his instructor. The mate has an incredulous look on his face as the helm swings freely. Then, rather gently considering the circumstance, he asks politely, "Could you bring the ship with you?" For The Kids... What do golfers use in China? China tees! What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy! Why did the child study in the aeroplane? He wanted a higher education! In the park this morning I was surrounded by Lions! Lions, in the Park? Well, dandelions! What do you mean by telling everyone that I'm an idiot? I'm sorry, I didn't know it was supposed to be a secret! Why are goldfish red? The water turns them rusty! What is the best hand to write with? Neither - it's best to write with a pen! |
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