Keep Your Seat

A radical feminist is getting on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his seat.

She thinks to herself, "Here's another man trying to keep up the customs of a patriarchal society by offering a poor, defenseless woman his seat," and she pushes him back onto the seat.

A few minutes later, the man tries to get up again. She is insulted again and refuses to let him up.

Finally, the man says,

"Look, lady, you've got to let me get up. I'm two miles past my stop already."





Foreman

Two neighbors were talking about work, when one asked, "Say, why did the foreman fire you?"

Replied the second, "Well, you know how a foreman is always standing around and watching others do the work. My foreman got jealous. People started thinking I was the foreman."





Hippopotamus, New York

A woman called to make reservations "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent asked "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"

"Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer.

After some searching, the agent came back with "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere."

The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered.

"You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal" was the reply.


Life Is All About A$$!!!

Your either covering it.

Laughing it off.

Kicking it.

Busting it.

Trying to get a piece of it.

Behaving like one.

Or you live with one.




For The Kids...

What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather?
Skate!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!

What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbours?
A hermit crab!

What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?
As far away as possible!

You and your jokes... you slay me lol

I saw this one today.

Clemson Study

A 2007 study by Clemson University found that the average American walks about 900 miles per year.

Another study by the American Beer Institute found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year.

That means, on average, Americans get approximately 41 miles per gallon - not bad!

Haha, thanks for the laugh this morning!