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    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
    		  
    #1

    Feb 27, 2007, 08:28 AM
    Don't try this at home!
    A man moves into a nudist colony. He receives a
    letter from his
    grandmother asking him to send her a current photo
    of himself in his
    new location. Too embarrassed to let her know that
    he lives in a
    nudist colony, he cuts a photo in half and mails it.
    The next day he discovers that he had accidentally
    sent the bottom half of the photo.
    He's really worried but then remembers how bad his
    grandmother's
    eyesight is, & hopes she won't notice. A few weeks
    later, he receives
    a letter from his Grandmother. It says:
    "Thank you for the picture. Change your hairstyle.
    . . . it makes your
    nose look too short."

    Love, Grandma

    THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER...


    Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the
    Mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small.

    Instead of characteristically telling me
    It's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.

    "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day
    take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few
    seconds."

    Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of
    Toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between
    My breasts.

    "How long will this take?" I
    Asked.

    "They will grow larger over a period of years,"
    My Husband replies.

    I stopped.

    "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet
    paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger
    over the years?"

    Without missing a beat he says, "Worked for
    your butt, didn't it?"


    He's still alive, and with a great deal of
    Therapy, he may even walk again, although he will probably
    Continue to take his meals through a straw.



    > Stupid, stupid man.
    magprob's Avatar
    magprob Posts: 1,877, Reputation: 300
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #2

    Feb 27, 2007, 09:59 AM
    Oh boy... I'm out of here!
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #3

    Feb 27, 2007, 10:22 AM
    Teehee, teehee.
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