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    mohammed farook's Avatar
    mohammed farook Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 15, 2016, 04:46 PM
    On First night not having sex due to wife health not proper is it haram ?
    Assalamu alaikkum

    I would like ask one question it's very important . If my wife is not well or weak body for carrying baby form. Can I hold until she get well soon.because I heard and by Islam first night is jannah for both having xxx. If we are not having xxx together is it haram on first day ? Please reply me soon

    Thanks and regards
    Mohd farook

    Allahfiz
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,305, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Jun 15, 2016, 07:25 PM
    Some couples do not even have the ability to have sex. Health reasons are exceptions to many things.
    Are you so concerned over religion, above your wife's health and safety?
    mohammed farook's Avatar
    mohammed farook Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jun 15, 2016, 11:31 PM
    Thank you very much for Fr_chuck . First of all I'm worried about her health and there is safety way but if not using that may be in case body is very weak. Doctor will say abort your baby that's not better for her health right if we do that its big haram in my religion that's why I'm asking .
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,593, Reputation: 2941
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    #4

    Jun 16, 2016, 01:34 AM
    If her doctor says that her health is in danger because she is pregnant, then listen to the doctor. If the doctor is Muslim, talk about it with him or her. If not, then talk to your imam.
    You don't have an imam, and that's why you are online? Then just listen to the doctor. Why would you put religion before her life?
    CravenMorhead's Avatar
    CravenMorhead Posts: 4,532, Reputation: 1065
    Adult Sexuality Expert
     
    #5

    Jun 16, 2016, 07:20 AM
    The one thing to remember is that God, by whatever name, is understanding and forgiving. Your wife's health is paramount. There might be a good reason why she's not well due to her pregnancy. Knowing what it is is better and that allows you to take the best course to preserve her health and then the health of the unborn child. As Joypulv suggested, it is best to talk to your Imam about this, but also remember about your own connected to Allah.

    Good luck.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
    Marriage Expert
     
    #6

    Jun 16, 2016, 08:59 AM
    If I am reading the question correctly, the op is concerned about his soon-to-be-wife and their wedding night. It sounds like she is in poor health and he is concerned that she could become pregnant if they consummate their vows.

    I agree that you should talk to your Imam. I will say that from what I have read it is okay to wait.

    This is a site that has been consulted for previous questions, https://islamqa.info/en/127586 . It seems to agree with several other sites I have seen.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,318, Reputation: 5972
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    #7

    Jun 16, 2016, 09:59 PM
    Cat, until you posted I didn't read it that way, but now that you posted, I'm seeing it that way too.

    It sounds like the OP is getting married, and that his soon to be wife may not be physically fit to carry a child. He's worried that if they have sex the first night of their marriage, which is customary in his religion, that she could become pregnant and put her life at risk. He wants to know if it's okay for them not to have sex until she's healthy enough for a pregnancy, because he doesn't want to risk a pregnancy that could be very dangerous for her considering her physical ailments.

    I don't know what the law is for your religion, but I want to say that anything you do for the love of the person you're marrying, can't be wrong in any God's eyes. You love the woman you're about to marry, and you want her to be safe. Your Allah, same as the God I believe in, would surely smile on that, and bless that.

    I wish you all the best in your marriage, and I for one commend you for the concern you have for the woman you're about to be with forever. I hope that one day she's strong enough and that you are blessed with a family. They'd be very lucky to have parents like you. :)

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