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    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Oct 1, 2007, 05:09 PM
    What about being bored?
    I wrote like two things on my 5 year old already... spiritually, he speaks of the bible, God, Christ on a daily... he has been doing this since age 2.

    He has a keen sense of observation, and memory.

    Recently, he came to us to tell us he is "bored" in his kindergarten class and that his one day a week karate is also "boring to him".

    Just.. wanted to ask all of you out there whom have gifted children...

    Is this something I might want to look into... as far as getting him tested?

    I can't imagine a kid being bored of school this early...

    Does this happen...

    I do have an older daughter whom is gifted and was tested and is very gifted.

    I don't want to set my son up for failure and put him in something that is too challanging unless he is up for the task.

    I did an online IQ test for a 6 year old with him... not sure what the results are... but I do know he was getting things like the meaning of "holocaust" correct.. and I have no idea how he knows these things or where he learned it from...

    Thanks
    Bunnypoo4
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,870, Reputation: 5429
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    #2

    Oct 1, 2007, 05:15 PM
    Is he truly bored, or is he feeding off what he hears from you?

    I had suggested in the past to teach him how NOT to be bored. After all, being bored isn't necessarily a bad thing. Being bored pushes smart people to look, all by themselves, for new challenges and not rely on Mom and other people to make life more exciting and interesting.

    How is his social IQ? That's more important at his age than his knowledge IQ.

    Your local public library is full of parenting and children's-level books that teach ways to not be bored. Please visit the library and check out some books to help.
    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #3

    Oct 1, 2007, 05:35 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    Is he truly bored, or is he feeding off what he hears from you?

    I had suggested in the past to teach him how NOT to be bored. After all, being bored isn't necessarily a bad thing. Being bored pushes smart people to look, all by themselves, for new challenges and not rely on Mom and other people to make life more exciting and interesting.

    How is his social IQ? That's more important at his age than his knowledge IQ.

    Your local public library is full of parenting and children's-level books that teach ways to not be bored. Please visit the library and check out some books to help.
    On the contrary I never have said or done anything for him to say this... (thinking in terms of him being bored)
    I read to him 6-8 books a night, and a children's bible as well...

    I have no idea what his social IQ is... I don't know how about even checking into this...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,870, Reputation: 5429
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    #4

    Oct 1, 2007, 05:58 PM
    Why is karate boring to him?

    (He may hear you tell others about how bored he is and is playing the role to the hilt. I would knock myself out teaching him how NOT to be bored.)

    The library will have books on all the kinds of IQ including social IQ. Ask the librarian to find a test too.
    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #5

    Oct 1, 2007, 06:39 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    Why is karate boring to him?

    (He may hear you tell others about how bored he is and is playing the role to the hilt. I would knock myself out teaching him how NOT to be bored.)

    The library will have books on all the kinds of IQ including social IQ. Ask the librarian to find a test too.
    Thanks so much for your advice...

    But I never mention about him being "bored" around him... I try not to use "name calling or anything negative towards him.. "

    I know my younger daughter is often bored with her twirling... classes.. but I spell things out when talking about that...

    Like I said I don't mention this around them... I don't think it's good

    But thank you so much for your advice... maybe I will just play it cool and if his report cards show something then maybe I will think about talking about accelerated classes if he isn't challenged
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,870, Reputation: 5429
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    #6

    Oct 1, 2007, 06:48 PM
    You didn't answer my question--why is karate boring to him? The answer(s) to this will give you and me a lot of information about what and how he is thinking.
    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #7

    Oct 1, 2007, 07:02 PM
    Well he had the discussion with his father... this is how it all came about. My husband asked him if he liked karate... and he said "no he didn't like it and it was boring...like Mrs. Keitts class" My husband then asked him... why is your class boring... and he said "because all we do is recess and lunch and all we do is read out loud)... and read a little" (btw this is supposed to be the best teacher in the school)...

    I have attended his Karate.. its more of a self defense for little kids his age... class and not enough concentration on karate... and he only goes 1 day a week for 1 hour.

    And from what I see with his teacher.. she doesn't really send home any home work.. and he is asking me for some home work...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,870, Reputation: 5429
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    #8

    Oct 1, 2007, 07:14 PM
    So we don't know why he thinks karate is boring.

    Has either parent sat in on his school class to find out how boring it is? Has either parent talked with the best teacher in the school to find out her impression of how bored he is and if he is, could she hand out extra-credit assignments of some kind to the speedier students?

    I've taught preschool and kindergarten. We were busy ever single minute. The kids were learning something every single minute, even if they didn't know they were learning it--like sitting still, listening to someone else talk, sharing, being patient, helping me or each other, etc.

    Karate class for small children is much that way--learning how to listen and respond, being patient, working with adults and other children, practicing simple moves and developing katas, etc. The most important thing they learn is how to back off.

    The first belt achievement is a yellow belt. Has he gotten his yellow belt yet? (One hour a week isn't much time to get bored in.)
    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #9

    Oct 1, 2007, 08:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    So we don't know why he thinks karate is boring.

    Has either parent sat in on his school class to find out how boring it is? Has either parent talked with the best teacher in the school to find out her impression of how bored he is and if he is, could she hand out extra-credit assignments of some kind to the speedier students?

    I've taught preschool and kindergarten. We were busy ever single minute. The kids were learning something every single minute, even if they didn't know they were learning it--like sitting still, listening to someone else talk, sharing, being patient, helping me or each other, etc.

    Karate class for small children is much that way--learning how to listen and respond, being patient, working with adults and other children, practicing simple moves and developing katas, etc. The most important thing they learn is how to back off.

    The first belt achievement is a yellow belt. Has he gotten his yellow belt yet? (One hour a week isn't much time to get bored in.)
    You know I am really glad you mentioned this.. b.c I am going to speak with his teacher tomorrow and find out what the deal is... I just don't want to hurt her feelings...

    I don't know... when I looked in his class on parents night... it looked as if the teacher had quite a bit to do and activities... she had a lot of centers

    He doesn't even have a belt in karate yet.. they don't do enough...
    I put him in karate b.c I felt he needed something to help build confidence as he doesn't "stand up for himself"I believe you... one hour a week isn't enough time to get bored in... Maybe what he meant is that it wasn't enough...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,870, Reputation: 5429
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    #10

    Oct 1, 2007, 09:48 PM
    I think we're onto something here. "Bored" isn't necessarily the right word to describe what is going on with your son. Is he taking advantage of every opportunity to investigate and play in the various "centers" the teacher has set up? Maybe he is sitting on the sidelines and not participating? Don't worry about her feelings. She will be more than glad to talk with you and to work with you to figure out how best to help him both at home and at school.

    You could give him daily assignments too and challenge him both at home and at school. If you want ideas, let me know.

    As for the karate, give it time. I would let him be in the class at least six months before I would consider pulling him out. Talk with the instructors about him too. They certainly have observed him in class and how his attitude is. And you don't want him to become a "quitter". I had a child client like that in my counseling days. Every time he said the word "bored" or "I hate it", the parents pulled him out of whatever it was. Soon he realized he didn't have to do anything constructive and stick to anything--he could just say the magic words and his parents jumped to please him. He was headed toward being a little control freak.
    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #11

    Oct 2, 2007, 07:34 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    I think we're onto something here. "Bored" isn't necessarily the right word to describe what is going on with your son. Is he taking advantage of every opportunity to investigate and play in the various "centers" the teacher has set up? Maybe he is sitting on the sidelines and not participating? Don't worry about her feelings. She will be more than glad to talk with you and to work with you to figure out how best to help him both at home and at school.

    You could give him daily assignments too and challenge him both at home and at school. If you want ideas, let me know.

    As for the karate, give it time. I would let him be in the class at least six months before I would consider pulling him out. Talk with the instructors about him too. They certainly have observed him in class and how his attitude is. And you don't want him to become a "quitter". I had a child client like that in my counseling days. Every time he said the word "bored" or "I hate it", the parents pulled him out of whatever it was. Soon he realized he didn't have to do anything constructive and stick to anything--he could just say the magic words and his parents jumped to please him. He was headed toward being a little control freak.

    You must know my son.. b.c he is rather shy and it sounds like you "hit the nail on the head"...

    I understand what you mean about be "quitting" he pulled this with soccer last year.. and I wouldn't let him quit.. I let him finish out the season... just for the experience... I told him he had to finish it out

    He mentioned P.E was boring.. and I told him he had to do it... it was part of school... and physical education is just as important as all the other areas of learning... b.c it invovles physical cordination and helps build self esteem and confidence and helps endurance and all aspects of the body to help him grow.. and if the didn't do this... he would become weak in his body and playing outside would be a hard thing... to do...

    I do have a workbook at home..

    Last year we did a lot of "homework" I had him do...

    He was used to that...

    And he asks for it.. so maybe it is something he is looking for..

    Yes I would love any advice or help you can offer...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,870, Reputation: 5429
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    #12

    Oct 2, 2007, 09:58 AM
    My older son was very shy and always held back, stayed on the sidelines. I knew he was smart and couldn't understand why he never had anything to "report" about his time at school. I'd ask him what had happened all day and was told "nothing". As a teacher myself, I knew that wasn't correct! I found out fast that male children don't report to moms like female children do. I had to depend on Becky, his classmate in our car pool, to give me all the details of the schoolday! (She didn't stop talking the whole drive from school to her house... ) I learned from my son that what a mom hears or doesn't hear from her child is not necessarily the whole story.

    One assignment would be Top Secret, just between you and him. He would pick out one classmate whose name he knows. Write down that child's name at the top of a sheet of paper. His assignment would be to watch and listen to that child every day and bring home at least one idea to write down on the paper. For instance, you two have picked David. On Monday David helped Teacher hand out the napkins before snacktime. David was careful to give each child a napkin. He did not miss anyone. He laid down each napkin carefully on the table in front of the child. He did a good job. So, on the paper for David, print "Monday - David handed out napkins. Good job." Similarly, Tuesday might be "Tuesday - David took truck away from Billy. Not good."

    This would be a way to take note of classmates' good and bad behavior, one child per week. It will also be a way for your son to observe the other students and to get to know each one. Of course, your mission would be to talk with your son about the whys and how's of the behaviors, and which behavior is preferred in order to get along with others in life.

    Then, one day, after making sheets for a few classmates for a few weeks, print your son's name at the top of a sheet. This will be HIS week. HIS actions will be recorded. He will tell you the good stuff, but try to probe a little to find out if he did anything not quite right--not to punish him, but to give you the opportunity to list it on the sheet and, most important, to talk with him about what he did incorrectly and how he should have done it for better results, and even discuss what those better results would have been.

    Hopefully, he will realize (with your prompting) that we make good and bad choices and behave well and badly, and that our choices affect other people. Making a good choice is better than making a bad choice. When we make a good choice, everyone feels good and happy, etc. Bad choices make us feel upset inside and make everyone feel sad.

    This sort of thing, by the way, observing classmates and evaluating behavior, is part of that social IQ thing I mentioned. You want to build empathy in your son, so always ask him how a child would feel if he took that child's truck away or if he, as napkin person, gave napkins to everyone except for that child. Also, examine with him how HE would feel.

    I have more ideas...
    BUNNYPOO4's Avatar
    BUNNYPOO4 Posts: 30, Reputation: 2
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    #13

    Oct 3, 2007, 08:07 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    I think we're onto something here. "Bored" isn't necessarily the right word to describe what is going on with your son. Is he taking advantage of every opportunity to investigate and play in the various "centers" the teacher has set up? Maybe he is sitting on the sidelines and not participating? Don't worry about her feelings. She will be more than glad to talk with you and to work with you to figure out how best to help him both at home and at school.

    You could give him daily assignments too and challenge him both at home and at school. If you want ideas, let me know.

    As for the karate, give it time. I would let him be in the class at least six months before I would consider pulling him out. Talk with the instructors about him too. They certainly have observed him in class and how his attitude is. And you don't want him to become a "quitter". I had a child client like that in my counseling days. Every time he said the word "bored" or "I hate it", the parents pulled him out of whatever it was. Soon he realized he didn't have to do anything constructive and stick to anything--he could just say the magic words and his parents jumped to please him. He was headed toward being a little control freak.
    That last idea you gave, was a good one.. I was talking it over with him this morning...

    And he wants to do it..

    I think.. he is having issues with shyness... he was ill yesterday and didn't want to tell the teacher... he waited until the teacher came to him...

    I did speak with the teacher briefly about his request for more activity... she mentioned they weren't doing much in the class as she was about to test.. and didn't want to have a lot on her students... but she said she will assign him extra work if that is what he wants...

    I believe for the most part.. the shyness is a big issue and it takes time for him to warm up to someone or to have "trust" in someone.. and I don't even know whyhe is this way... but I do know everyone is different in their own way.. and I am not going to fault him for it... also not a risk taker...

    I want to anything and everything to help him out of this "shell"

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