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    ginamarie888's Avatar
    ginamarie888 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    May 10, 2013, 05:37 PM
    I've always wanted to be a foster parent but have been too afraid
    From when I was young, and my neighbor was a foster parent, I always felt that that was such a loving, and important service. I have always wanted to do it, but have been afraid of all the negative things involved with it. I don't know if I could handle giving a child back, after I got attached to him or her. Does anyone have any good feedback, positive feedback on foster parenting so that perhaps I could be encouraged?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,278, Reputation: 7690
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    #2

    May 10, 2013, 05:49 PM
    It is very hard, if you start to get too emotionally attached. And knowing at times the child is going back to the parents who were abusive, in past, or child does not want to go.
    But also, getting a child that is dangerous, or a child that is hard to control.
    The issues are many. Perhaps you should look into it, more, visit with other people who aree doing this
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,505, Reputation: 4600
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    #3

    May 11, 2013, 08:09 AM
    It is an absolutely bad idea for you, and I doubt your application would be accepted. Is this "foster child" filling a void in your life or are you thinking of fostering in order to help a child? There's a difference.

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/parent...ps-748368.html
    ginamarie888's Avatar
    ginamarie888 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    May 11, 2013, 02:20 PM
    Well, when I was growing up, I had a neighbor who was a foster mom. I didn't know what that was at all, but I saw her with a baby in a leg cast, and I asked my mother about it. She explained that this woman was so special, because she would help babies who were hurt, and take care of them until they got better and could go home. I was only about 6 or 7 years old, so that was her way of describing this to me at that time. As I grew up, I learned about what it is, and what these children have to deal with. In my opinion, it's such an awesome way to serve, because these children really do need a safe place and a loving place. I've always thought about being that to someone, but as I said, it's frightening because of all that's involved and I know how difficult it would be for me emotionally, when the time came to give the baby back.As far as filling a void as you put it, I don't think there is a void. I love children and babies. I am a nurturer, which is probably why I became a nurse. But, in any case, I do respect that you think it's an absolutely bad idea, and that you believe my application would not be accepted. I thank you for your time and response
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,505, Reputation: 4600
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    #5

    May 11, 2013, 02:49 PM
    You have problems with your own daughter, a problem you cannot solve.

    I do not think fostering is a good idea for you at this time.
    catlady23's Avatar
    catlady23 Posts: 61, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    May 11, 2013, 02:59 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ginamarie888 View Post
    Well, when i was growing up, i had a neighbor who was a foster mom. I didn't know what that was at all, but i saw her with a baby in a leg cast, and i asked my mother about it. She explained that this woman was so special, because she would help babies who were hurt, and take care of them until they got better and could go home. I was only about 6 or 7 years old, so that was her way of describing this to me at that time. As i grew up, i learned about what it is, and what these children have to deal with. In my opinion, it's such an awesome way to serve, because these children really do need a safe place and a loving place. I've always thought about being that to someone, but as i said, it's frightening because of all that's involved and i know how difficult it would be for me emotionally, when the time came to give the baby back.As far as filling a void as you put it, I don't think there is a void. I love children and babies. I am a nurturer, which is probably why i became a nurse. But, in any case, i do respect that you think it's an absolutely bad idea, and that you believe my application would not be accepted. I thank you for your time and response
    I believe, from experience and hearing other adopters speak, that it is a natural thing to have some fear in regards to contemplating adoption. It is a very real circumstance, that should be taken with much thought.

    Kids in need of adoption, in most circumstances, are pulled out of decadent homes and have seen a great deal of disturbing things. I believe that a nurturing nurse would be a great candidate for adopting.
    ginamarie888's Avatar
    ginamarie888 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    May 11, 2013, 06:01 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by catlady23 View Post
    I believe, from experience and hearing other adopters speak, that it is a natural thing to have some fear in regards to contemplating adoption. It is a very real circumstance, that should be taken with much thought.

    Kids in need of adoption, in most circumstances, are pulled out of decadent homes and have seen a great deal of disturbing things. I believe that a nurturing nurse would be a great candidate for adopting.
    Thanks very much cat :) I'm going to consider it possibly one day
    ginamarie888's Avatar
    ginamarie888 Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    May 11, 2013, 06:08 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    You have problems with your own daughter, a problem you cannot solve.

    I do not think fostering is a good idea for you at this time.
    Thanks for all your insight judykay. I'll consider your opinions. Concerning a post I wrote concerning my relationship with my adult daughter, believe me, in my opinion there is always hope because love always wins. I raised my daughter and watched her become a beautiful young woman. I believe one day the struggles we've had together will be resolved and we will have a great relationship. I wish you the best thanks for your time and caring concern :)
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,505, Reputation: 4600
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    #9

    May 12, 2013, 08:32 AM
    Ginamarie, I certainly hope you are right. Your daughter has problems but you have not allowed them to tear your family and marriage apart. That very often is the case.

    I am addressing what Family Services will look at when evaluating you as a foster parent. I have a relative who was turned down because one of her children was a previous drug user, clean for 3 years.

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