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    mommyb123's Avatar
    mommyb123 Posts: 10, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    May 13, 2008, 12:25 AM
    Can you be a single foster mom?
    I have thought a lot about foster care to! But is it hard to become a foster mom?
    Do they even allow it?
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #2

    May 13, 2008, 01:28 AM
    Whether it would be allowed or not would depend on the laws where you live. Around where I live, it is allowed.

    To be a foster parent can be really challenging, but also rewarding! Please remember that foster children are typically coming from situations that have been difficult for them because of abuse, neglect, or other family problems. It is the temporary placement of children outside of their own homes. You most likely will need to have a lot of patience, coping and teaching skills!

    I am hopeful that others will come along to also add their advice.
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #3

    May 13, 2008, 10:06 AM
    This is a very big step. I am sure it is allowed. As far as I know you need to have electricity, a bed for the child, food, and a clear back ground check. Can you please tell me what state you are in. What are the issues driving you to do this?
    HistorianChick's Avatar
    HistorianChick Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 825
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    #4

    May 13, 2008, 10:28 AM
    A friend of mine recently adopted the little boy that she was foster Mom to. She has had nothing but joy from her experience as a single foster Mom. Her little boy is her pride and joy - she'd never change anything about it.

    But... it has been difficult. She is not wealthy, by any means, and it has been a serious financial struggle, but according to her, TOTALLY worth it.

    If you choose to take a step like this, make sure that you have friends and family around that are willing to help with babysitting, etc.

    It's a BIG step and a HUGE decision. Yes, its allowed. But you have to know what you're getting into before hand and have made adequate preparations for the child.
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #5

    May 13, 2008, 10:52 AM
    Chicky that is wonderful! ;)
    I do have to say that with my experience, when you have a child in your home, that child is a ward of the state, so this means any and all you have babysit will need to be getting a back groud check. It isn't hard to do. So with that being said, having family and friends who support you is a wonderful idea! I also agree with Clough, as he stated most of these kids have been through a lot so it isn't like you are getting some happy to see you kid. I know that sounds harsh but depending on the age, and what the child has suffered from, you just never know what is going to walk into your life. The whole reason for the foster system is to put these kids into a home that will take careof them till they find the parent fit to get them back. There also may be a certain cause that makes it so the parents can NEVER have the kids back, so this would mean that child would need permanent foster care. There are so many issues and causes at play. I don't know your situation, but if you tell us, we can better help you and support you in the process;)
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #6

    May 14, 2008, 04:46 PM
    Yes you can. I was one at the age of 23. They of did did a crimal background chec and check if you had a case with acs, don't know want its called where you lived. They also do a home visit see where you live is livable for the child and there space. I also had to attend a foster parent class and had to prove I was able to take care of the finanical.

    After that was done I had a girl for one year until she was returned to the mother for good. I had to take her to the foster care agency once a week so her mother could see her and the caseworker visited my house from time to time. I was sad when she left because I was attached to her and really loved her and after that I never did it again because I didn't want to go through the pain of another child leaving, but I still get to speak to her and her mother sends pictures and recently asked me to be her godmother, which I accepted. I happy her mother got her act together and treats her good.

    Go to your local agency and sign up but know there's different types of foster parent long term, emergency, and crisis foster parent. You even have the choice if you want to deal with a child with disabilites.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,305, Reputation: 7692
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    #7

    May 14, 2008, 06:09 PM
    There are many levels of foster parents, there are those that take in children from emergancy, they stay a few weeks and are moved somewhere else, only staying when they are taken out of a home and need to be put somewhere waiting on processing.

    There are those who are placed waiting for adoption, and others placed there will remain in the system most likely till they are 18
    MOWERMAN2468's Avatar
    MOWERMAN2468 Posts: 3,214, Reputation: 243
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    #8

    May 15, 2008, 10:18 AM
    Some states would allow you to be a single foster parent I am sure.
    sproon's Avatar
    sproon Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Sep 28, 2014, 04:15 PM
    I'm a single foster DAD. I've had four foster kids over eight years, two girls and two boys. One stayed with me for seven years and the child with me now will be with me for another five at least. As a single male it was a bit uphill to get accepted - there is a lot of prejudice against men out there, especially in the care system. But it's worked fine - more rewarding than challenging but the challenges are there. So, yes if I can do it, then I'm sure you can
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,305, Reputation: 7692
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    #10

    Sep 28, 2014, 10:10 PM
    Great advice, great post, but this is a 6 year old thread.

    So I am closing it.

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