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    DZRTFX4's Avatar
    DZRTFX4 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    May 27, 2009, 04:23 PM
    Rights as a Father of Unborn Son
    So I know that I don't have any rights as a father until paternity is established. She is trying to move out of state on me. I live in Ca and she is going to Fl. Can I stop her?

    She doesn't have a job or her own place. She is living with her sister and her family. She is already trying to get money out of me. We are no longer together. She hasn't had a job in the past 2 years and still doesn't. She is expecting me to support her and my son.

    So I guess I want to know what my financial responsibilities are for this situation. I want to be there 150% for my son but I am tired of taking care of her. I know as soon as my son is born there will be child support. Im not worried about paying anything I have to and will without question. She is trying to say that I need to pay for it all . I have a good job and safe house for him to live in. I don't want to take my son away from her mother. If she was to move then I would do anything I could to get him back here with me.

    Sorry if I sound or wrote that weird, all this has made it hard to think straight.

    Thanks for any help.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #2

    May 27, 2009, 04:26 PM

    If she leaves then go to the courts and file for paternity and custody of the child. You need to request full custody. When granted she must return the child. If she doesn't want to that's kidnapping and she can go to prison. Don't let her get away with a move away.
    cadillac59's Avatar
    cadillac59 Posts: 1,326, Reputation: 94
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    #3

    May 27, 2009, 06:56 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by DZRTFX4 View Post
    So I know that I dont have any rights as a father untill paternity is established. She is trying to move out of state on me. I live in Ca and she is going to Fl. Can i stop her?

    She doesnt have a job or her own place. She is living with her sister and her family. She is already trying to get money out of me. We are no longer together. She hasnt had a job in the past 2 years and still doesnt. She is expecting me to support her and my son.

    So I guess I want to know what my financial responsibilities are for this situation. I want to be there 150% for my son but i am tired of taking care of her. I know as soon as my son is born there will be child support. Im not worried about paying anything I have to and will without question. She is trying to say that I need to pay for it all . I have a good job and safe house for him to live in. I dont want to take my son away from her mother. If she was to move then I would do anything I could to get him back here with me.

    Sorry if I sound or wrote that weird, all this has made it hard to think straight.

    Thanks for any help.
    You've asked one of the most interesting questions I've ever encountered on this board. Correct me if I am wrong: your girlfriend is pregnant with your son, the child was conceived in California where you both live but she wants to move to Florida. Did I get that right? Question: can you stop her from moving and can you get custody orders in California?

    In California you can file an action before a child is born to obtain custody orders that would apply when the child is born; i.e, they would be prospective custody orders. In spite of the common misunderstanding out there that surrounds this subject, you do not have to wait until the child pops out to run to court and ask for custody or visitation, not at least in California. You could file right now to establish paternity and seek custody [as I said, prospectively, of course].

    Now, when you file such an action, temporary restraining orders go into effect automatically the enjoin the parties from removing a child of the relationship from the state without the written permission of the other parent or a court order. But, if you file tomorrow, will the restraining orders prevent your girlfriend from leaving the state, as a pregnant mom? In other words, is the unborn child a "child" for purposes of the restraining orders [oh no, I've heard THAT question come up before, is an unborn child a child? ] See the problem? My hunch is the restraining orders cannot stop her from leaving the state while pregnant. And I don't know how you can force her to give birth in any particular state, which leads to the next problem.

    If you cannot stop the mom from leaving the state pregnant (and I don't know how you can), will California pre-birth custody orders be jurisdictionally valid if the child is born in Florida? If the child is born in Florida, then Florida immediately becomes the child's "home state" for child custody jurisdiction purposes and California's claim to custody jurisdiction would be questionable [the relevant statute, the UCCJEA, that controls custody jurisdiction, appears to contemplate jurisdiction only over child who are born, not over the unborn].

    These questions, to my knowledge, have no specific answer to them in statutory or case law (If anyone has an answer, please chime in--where's GV70, by the way! )

    My recommendation: file an action in California, ask for pre-birth custody orders (again, never mind the apparent absurdity to the notion of having custody of an unborn child, the orders would be prospective and apply at the birth of the child) and this alone might dissuade the mom from leaving until your son is born. I'd do it right away. The sooner the better.
    DZRTFX4's Avatar
    DZRTFX4 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jun 1, 2009, 02:58 PM

    Ok thank you for your answers. Does anyone know about my other questions?
    stinawords's Avatar
    stinawords Posts: 2,071, Reputation: 150
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    #5

    Jun 1, 2009, 09:46 PM

    Cadi did a great job and I'm not really sure what your other questions are. If you mean is there a way you can prevent her from moving... well probably not. If you mean about the paying for everything no you don't have to pay for everything. Being that this would be pretty new to the court system (I don't know of any case law on this either) depending on how far along your girlfriend is there may or may not be a chance at a judge ordering her to stay until the paternaty results come back. It would also help your case if you could prove what you have already paid.
    litrell's Avatar
    litrell Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Aug 13, 2010, 07:06 AM
    I'm going through the same problem I need a number that I can call so she can't move away cause I love my child and if she move then I want be able to see them for 2 years sum1 help please give me any number I mite can call please sum 1
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
    Internet Research Expert
     
    #7

    Aug 13, 2010, 01:51 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by litrell View Post
    im going thru the same problem i need a number that i can call so she can't move away cause i love my child and if she move then i want be able to see them for 2 years sum1 help *** give me any number i mite can call *** sum 1
    First off your piggybacked onto an old question. And second we have no clue where you are or where this is taking place. How could we provide you with anything ?

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