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earringmum · Sep 6, 2009, 02:02 PM

Hi I am looking to find out where I stand on a very silly topic.

My ex-husband took my 11yr old son to have his ear pierced when he knew that it was against my wishes. We have been split for over 4yrs. He is still with the same girl he left me for and I myself have also moved on recently getting re-married earlier this year taking on 4 children. Both my ex and son knew the consequences of the piercing and still went ahead with it. My son has just started a very good all boys school which does not allow piercings. I know it may sound harsh and old fashioned but its just the way I am. This was over 6wks ago now and I have not had any contact from my son even though I have text him every day and his phone is constantly off.. my ex has contacted child support of which I am now having to pay the child maintenance. He is not allowing me the access to see him. Before all this happened my son only ever went to his fathers twice a week and 1wks holiday every 2yrs. His partner does not have any children. I am going out of my head as I have never been away from him this long and it is tearing me up inside, not sleeping/eating and it is causing a huge strain on my new married life. What can I do? :(

redhed35 · Sep 6, 2009, 02:07 PM

Hey,welcome to the site,your in the introductions section.

This is where people say hello and a little about themselvess.

Your question will be seen by more people if you post in the legal section,if its legal advice you need,or people and family section if you would perfer that.

Regards.

Clough · Sep 6, 2009, 09:24 PM

Greetings and WELCOME to the site, earringmum!

I moved your question out of Introductions to this forum topic area so that it will be more likely to be noticed and addressed by those who are best able to answer it. Your question will get noticed much more here.

Introductions is for people to introduce themselves only, and we try to not ask questions there. We would appreciate it if you would return to Introductions sometime to tell us a little bit about yourself, if you would be willing to do that.

I do note, that your question already received a response while it was in Introductions.

Thanks!

Synnen · Sep 7, 2009, 08:31 AM

What do you do?

Get a lawyer, get custody established, along with child support payments.

THEN you get over the fact that your ex has rights too, and if he gave your son permission for the piercing, you're SOL.

excon · Sep 7, 2009, 09:10 AM

Hello mum:

It sounds like there's a visitation agreement already in effect. Now, you just need to enforce it. You need to go back to court. There's probably a place where you can submit emergency petitions. A lawyer would certainly help.

The above is in terms of VISITATION. If you have FULL LEGAL custody, then you can complain about the piercing too. Otherwise the father has just as much right as you do to make those decisions.

excon

twinkiedooter · Sep 7, 2009, 10:19 AM

In some states this ear piercing or getting minors tattoos is illegal and the parent could end up in a lot of legal trouble for doing this. I don't think so much the ear piercing, but I know the tattoos will definitely get folks in trouble for having this done to minors. I hope dad didn't get sonny a tattoo as well.

All you have to do to make the ear piercing go away is to keep things out of the stud and the ear hole will grow shut on it's own.

As for visitations and child support, that must be addressed to the Court. Hire an attorney and go back to court to have this resolved.

ScottGem · Sep 7, 2009, 10:21 AM

You left out the key issues here. When you divorced a custody, support and visitation schedule was agreed to in court. What are the terms of that schedule. If your ex is violating the custody order that you have primary custody, he is violating the law. You get a copy of the order showing you have primary physical custody. And you show up at the ex's house and collect your son. If he refuses to give him up, then you go to the nearest police station, show them the custody order and ask that they accompany you to retrieve your son.

stevetcg · Sep 7, 2009, 05:00 PM

Originally Posted by twinkiedooter

In some states this ear piercing or getting minors tattoos is illegal and the parent could end up in a lot of legal trouble for doing this. I don't think so much the ear piercing, but I know the tattoos will definitely get folks in trouble for having this done to minors. I hope dad didn't get sonny a tattoo as well.

All you have to do to make the ear piercing go away is to keep things out of the stud and the ear hole will grow shut on it's own.

As for visitations and child support, that must be addressed to the Court. Hire an attorney and go back to court to have this resolved.

Yeah - ear piercings are not against the law... and I would venture to guess that is all states. We had our daughter's ears pierced when she was 3 months old.