Hi! My daughter is 4 yrs old and my husband wants to adopt her. Her bio father is in Prision and gets out April of 09 and told his mom he wants to be in her life (he is NOT on the birth cert. )and now so do they... but where were they the last 3 (his mom only seen my daughter 4 times, 3 which I took her to see her. That was in her 1st year.) When my daughter was one I met my now husband and now he wants to adpot her. Hes the only person she knows as her daddy/father. I really don't want my ex to beable to have rights because he's never been there at all or even seen her... because he's been in prision her whole life (4 yrs)... and a few letters here and there on hoildays, that's nothing compaired to what me and my husband have done for her everyday of her life. Please tell me what can we do? My husband really wants to be on the birth cerft. And for us to have all rights to my daughter! Can we file for adbandoment? Would that be the thing to do? Since my ex has never been in her life! PLEASE HELP? (26/F/Michigan)

First this needs to be in a thread of it's own. Second, no you can't file abandonment sooo many people get confused by that term it does not apply in situations like this. If your husband wants to adopt then you need to hire a lawyer (that practices family law) and have the beginning papers drawn up. You and your husband will have to go before a judge the bio father will also have to be notified and possibly there. I don't know if MI is one of the states that considers prison to be enough to terminate rights but it might be, your lawyer will know for sure. However, even if the adoption goes through your husband may not be put on the birth certificate (I know of many adoptions that leave the because with the bio parents) because of medical history reasons.

First its not a good idea to piggyback your question on someone else's. This can lead to confusion. You should start a new thread. So I've moved your question to its own thread.

There are several threads that deal with this issue and you should spend some time reading them.

What you need to do is get the bio father's rights terminated. Unless he agrees to it, you are going to have a hard time of it. You definitely need an attorney to prepare the adoption here. You need someone who understands the local laws to help you.

Like others have said you need to talk to a family law attorney in Michigan. Be sure to do so.

Just so you know, not all states would require an adoption for your husband to acquire the status of legal father (or termination of the bio-dad's parental rights). In California, where I practice, your husband would have the status of "presumed father" already because he has taken this child into him home and held the child out as his own. In effect, as you say, he has become the child's daddy in almost every sense of the word. You mentioned that the bio-dad is not on the birth certificate which would indicate to me that he did not sign a voluntary declaration of paternity when the child was born (and I assume you were never married to him). Further you never lived with the bio-dad as a family unit since you said he was in prison during your child's entire life. This would mean he has no presumption of paternity at all and could not compete with a claim on your husband's part to establish parentage.

Even though our statutory scheme would preclude the bio-dad in your case from every being able to establish himself as the child's legal father under these facts, we have a case (similar to yours) that says that in these types of cases (where a bio-dad seeks to establish himself as legal father in competition with another who has a presumption of paternity) it is unconstitutional to deny the bio-dad the right to do so. That doesn't mean the bio-dad would win, only that it would be up to the court to make a ruling on who should be declared the legal father. Still it would seem the odds are that your husband would prevail in this case any way.

Again, this is an analysis of California law. Michigan may or may not differ in its approach so you need to check this out with local counsel.