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bewpeaz · Jan 5, 2012, 02:18 PM

I would like to put my name on my son's birth certificate. My girlfriend did not put it at birth because she was married at the time to someone else and she mentioned it to the attendants at the hospital and they told her she couldn't put my name because legally my son was her husband's child and biologically he is mine. He carries my last name and lives with me while his mom lives elsewhere. I need to do this asap. Can anyone help?

JudyKayTee · Jan 5, 2012, 02:56 PM

Originally Posted by bewpeaz

I would like to put my name on my son's birth certificate. My girlfriend did not put it at birth because she was married at the time to someone else and she mentioned it to the attendants at the hospital and they told her she couldn't put my name because legally my son was her husband's child and biologically he is mine. He carries my last name and lives with me while his mom lives elsewhere. I need to do this asap. Can anyone help?

You can't - the child in MOST cases, by virtue of the marriage, is the husband's child.

Has DNA been done? If not, you don't have a hope of getting this accomplished.

How old is the child? How do you have custody if you are not the recognized birth father and not on the birth certificate?

And, last of all, where (State or Country)?

Fr_Chuck · Jan 5, 2012, 03:06 PM

Ok, so many issues,

Do you have any legal custody

Was the legal father ever removed as the legal father.

You may not have any rights unless you would be allowed to adopt the child in some states, in other you would have to go to court.

This is going to be hard and you will need an attorney.

If the child is living with you and you have no legal status, this could be very dangerous legally for you.

ScottGem · Jan 5, 2012, 03:39 PM

How did he come to live with you? In all US states, when a child is born to a couple that is currently married the husband is the presumed and legal father.

To change that you have to mount a paternity challenge in Family Court. Depending on where you are (ANY question on law needs to include your general locale as laws vary by area. ) there may be a time limit during which you can mount such a challenge.

If you have not gone to court for custody, paternity or even a name change, then you may currently have no legal right to care for this child. While a doctor may not ask for proof, a hospital is likely to require you prove your are the child's legal guardian before letting you approve medical care. By the way, why do you need to do this ASAP? What's the urgency?

So before we can answer your question, we need to know what has gone down in court and how your child is currently with you. It helps us help you if you give us the full story.

GV70 · Jan 5, 2012, 04:08 PM

OK-it depends on your location. States laws vary...

bewpeaz · Jan 5, 2012, 08:31 PM

Actually the husband is no where around he was in prison long before the birth of our son. My son lives with me because his mom moved to another state an could not manage to to take care of him.so she left him with me. He been living with me from birth. But he goes to visit her on holidays.he is seven years old we live in ny no dna haven't been taken. But his mom is willing to put me on his birth certificate but we both don't know which guidelines to take.im sorry when i said asap don't mean it like that is just that its been seven years an he lives with alone.. so basically its just for emergency purposes u never know. And hes getting big now im sure when he looks at his birth certificate he will like to see his fathers name on it.

ScottGem · Jan 6, 2012, 04:25 AM

First, please don't type in all caps.

Like we said the husband is the legal father. You have NO legal standing and I don't understand how you were allowed to register him for school or approve medical care. Someone is dropping the ball.

The good news is that you can rebut the paternity and you do need to do this ASAP. You should hire an attorney but you need to file a petition in Family Court to establish paternity and be awarded custody. Since it appears the mother will not contest this, it shouldn't be too difficult except if the legal father decides to contest it. Both will have to be served notice of the paternity action. As part of establishing paternity, you ask that his birth certificate be amended.

This has to be done in court and it needs to be done now before an emergency occurs and someone wakes up to the fact that you have no legal standing.

JudyKayTee · Jan 6, 2012, 08:47 AM

Fast answer - and I'm also in NY. You CANNOT be put on the birth certificate until DNA confirms you are the father. She was married. Her husband is the child's legal father.

You need an Attorney.

You shouldn't have waited 7 years (but I'm sure you know that).

I also don't know that he'll care whose name is on the because - children care about who loves them and raises them and gives them security. Plenty of children are raised by people who are not biologically connected to them. I'd be more concerned about the legalities of this than the child's interest in seeing the "real" father's name on the because.