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    Ilovemykids9398's Avatar
    Ilovemykids9398 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 24, 2010, 06:14 PM
    Ex has court ordered no contact order with son for 8 years and now wants visitation?
    To make a very long story short: Our marriage was abusive, mentally, physically, and emotional. My children and I were put through hell! Our son together was 2 1/2 when I left, I am not sure if he remembers anything about our life then, but underneath his nervous behaviors, I think at some degree he does. Anyway my son's last supervised visit with him was 6-2003, then in our divorce I was given sole-custody and he was ordered NO CONTACT with him until he completed some court ordered things, he had 3things to do... now it is 7 1/2 years later and his wants his supervised visits reinstated overnight every other week with people I don't trust or agree on, I only want his mother, for she in fact is the only person on his side that has a relationship with my son. He hasn't talked to his mother since my son's last visit where he publicly cussed her out in front of my son and his other son and the manager of the place had to ask him to leave so he wants visits with other people. Anyhow he is a alcoholic that refuses to see he's alcoholic, been diagnosed as bi-polar and to have anti-social personality disorder but he finds this false also, so I am sure those have only progressed. He is a stranger to my son, if my son was important to him he wouldn't of waited almost 8 years to complete the order... my son was 3 last time he seen him, it was a bad scene and I think it also contributes to his nervousness and after that weekend... he started peeing the bed again.had ben otty trained no acciedents for 6 months.. Now he hasn't had a try night since that weekend.. Doctors say he'll grow out of it and no medication has helped.. He's almost 12. Anyway, my current husband has raise him since he was 4 and although he knows "XXX" is he's real dad, when he references his dad he references my husband, who is really the only dad he can remember... I would love to take his rights and have my husband adopt him but he won't agree to that because his kids are his processions and he uses them for his own purposes such as my son's brother with his real dad as able to come to his mother's house every other weekend for 4 years when my son was there, so they could have a relationship, well 2 years ago when me and my husband did get married, his parents came and he stopped all visits with Tyler, so he ripped my son's brother out of his life and that was difficult for my son.. I do believe that both parents involvement is important, my daughter is with her father 50% of time and has been since she was 2 and it great but my son will be in danger and that scares the hell out of me.. I know this man and he's a dangerous an, but he knows how to "pretend" o get his way so I am really worried about my son... my question is will the courts reinstate visitations even though he is a stranger to my son and it's not in his best interest? I do have a good lawyer but still the final decision is going to be up to the judge.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #2

    Sep 24, 2010, 06:19 PM

    People change. I think supervised visits will be reinstated.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #3

    Sep 24, 2010, 06:21 PM

    Most likely there will be a reaquainting period so they can get to know each other and it be supervised. And if it goes well more time can be added. Mostly it depends on what kind of track record he is going to have from the point he files and starts visitation.
    Ilovemykids9398's Avatar
    Ilovemykids9398 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Sep 24, 2010, 06:51 PM
    Comment on califdadof3's post
    So can I have like a court appointed person to do this he has always had sight an sound visits when he had visits, the jugde reversed for like 2 vsists then it went back to sight & sound. He wants his supervisors changed & I only trust his parents.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #5

    Sep 24, 2010, 07:24 PM

    First, please do not use the comments feature to post follow-up. Use the Answer options instead.

    Courts are charged with acting in the best interests of the child. Generally they have ruled that a relationship with a natural parent is usually in those best interests. However, if you can prove he is a danger to the child, the courts should restrict his access.

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