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    ridefast's Avatar
    ridefast Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 30, 2008, 06:12 PM
    My brothers ashes
    My brother died 7/07. His wish was to be buried with our parents and had set aside funds to take care of this task. My brother had medical issues and was alone except for a close friend he had confided in. He left no will and upon his death, his son was left to make the decisions. My brother and his son had a strained relationship and so when the time came, his son told the coroner to cremate his dad and has no intent to claim his ashes. A year has passed and his remains are still at the morgue in Los Angeles, Calif.
    I have written and called my nephew trying to get him to sign a piece of paper stating that he will release the ashes to me, he will not do it. I have given up on him and called the coroner today to plead my case. They told me I must wait 2 years, then I can pay the fee and claim the remains. She then said "OR" I could get a court order.
    I live in Montana, how do I get a court order for LA, Calif. To release the ashes ? The gal said I could get it here in Montana but when I called the County Court to inquire, I was told they couldn't do it (more like, they never heard of this being done). Is there a way I could send for a court order then forward it to the coroner. All I would need from the nephew is a simple paper releasing the ashes and his signature and date. It doesn't need to be notarized according to the coroner. I am at the point of writing my own letter and signing his name to it. All I want to do is spread his ashes at a high mountain lake here in Montana. The boy wants them to be placed in a mass grave for unclaimed remains.
    Any help or advice, I am so far away !

    Thank You...
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Jul 30, 2008, 06:28 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ridefast
    My brother died 7/07. His wish was to be buried with our parents and had set aside funds to take care of this task. My brother had medical issues and was alone except for a close friend he had confided in. He left no will and upon his death, his son was left to make the decisions. My brother and his son had a strained relationship and so when the time came, his son told the coroner to cremate his dad and has no intent to claim his ashes. A year has passed and his remains are still at the morgue in Los Angeles, Calif.
    I have written and called my nephew trying to get him to sign a piece of paper stating that he will release the ashes to me, he will not do it. I have given up on him and called the coroner today to plead my case. They told me I must wait 2 years, then I can pay the fee and claim the remains. She then said "OR" I could get a court order.
    I live in Montana, how do I get a court order for LA, Calif. to release the ashes ? The gal said I could get it here in Montana but when I called the County Court to inquire, I was told they couldn't do it (more like, they never heard of this being done). Is there a way I could send for a court order then forward it to the coroner. All I would need from the nephew is a simple paper releasing the ashes and his signature and date. It doesn't need to be notarized according to the coroner. I am at the point of writing my own letter and signing his name to it. All I want to do is spread his ashes at a high mountain lake here in Montana. The boy wants them to be placed in a mass grave for unclaimed remains.
    Any help or advice, I am so far away !

    Thank You...


    You would have to file a petition in the California Court for this specific relief - the release of the ashes to you. You would need an Attorney. You will need proof in the form of affidavits from the people he discussed his burial wishes with as well as proof that he set money aside for this purpose.

    Quite frankly, I am very concerned that you would even consider forgery and submitting a false document.

    Your brother left no will - his son has every right (and I know this is not going to make you happy) to make whatever plans he wishes for your brother's remains. You have no legal standing.

    Who paid for the cremation?
    ridefast's Avatar
    ridefast Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jul 30, 2008, 06:39 PM
    That was frustration talking. The state paid, the son and ex. Took his bank account. His friend who he worked with for years and handled all of his finances tried all that he could with the court but was to no avail. There is nothing left except his ashes and being the last of our family, I feel it's my duty to "at least" keep him from the mass grave his son wants for him...

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