My wife and I still have an 18 year old son living with us. He graduated from high school, but is not interested in going any farther. We have offered to pay, but he's still not interested in school. He "hangs out" with his friends, and sometimes comes home drunk or high. We live in Tennessee and have considered trying to have him evicted from our home just to get his attention. Tennessee is a tough state and a parent can't just ask the child to leave, no matter what the age. Can you tell us what is involved with an eviction?

I found this website.

Your Rights and Responsibilities as a Minor Page 5

You can click on home or enter a search but I think the page answers your question.

Since your son is 18 and no longer considered a minor, by law you do not have to feed and shelter him if you so choose. I am assuming that he does not pay you any rent to live there. If he does, then you would have to evict him as per whatever the state dictates to evict a tenant. You can do a search on that by entering Tennessee Eviction Laws on "Google" or whatever search engine you use, and see what pops up.

If your son does not pay rent, I do have a suggestion if you really are serious about this.

Give him an ultimatum and put a specified time frame on it.

For example, tell him you and your wife are unwilling to support him for the rest of his life if he continues to live the way he has. Let him know that under the law, since he has turned 18 you are under no obligation. Then tell him that you are willing to support him if he chooses to go to college and maintain at least a ___ (2.5,? Up to you to choose) grade point average. If his grade point average does not meet the outlined expectations, he is to understand that he must leave your home. If he chooses to get a job, give him ___ days (30, 60, 90,. - whatever you feel is realistic and fair), to get one. Once he gets a job, he is to pay $___ ($250?? Again up to you to choose) per month for rent and food. He is responsible to do his own laundry and clean up after himself as if he were a paying tenant in your home.

If he does not stick to the agreed time frame, he is to understand that he must leave your home.

He needs to understand that life is made up of options and choices and, he is the one responsible for making those choices for himself, not you.

Write a contract between yourselves and your son, including your expectations and deadlines. Make him sign it. He needs to see that you are serious and that you will not put up with his lounging around, doing drugs, staying out all night with friends,. In other words, playtime is over.

I would buy a wall calendar and place it in a prominent place in your home with the date circled in bold black marker and the expectation for that date that you have listed in your contract.

This will make everything you are saying an absolute reality to him and you need to make it clear that the ultimate decision based upon the options that you give him, is his, and his alone to make. Keep pointing out the calendar as the hard evidence that you are not playing around and the clock is ticking.

If this doesn't light a fire under his butt, then you have to decide if you want to follow through on your threat.

Please remember, this is only a suggestion. It is what I would probably do if I was in your situation. Speak to some of your friends. Maybe they have other options, suggestions, or add ons.

Good Luck!

I agree with Ruby - your son is an adult now and time to act like an adult and not go out with the buddies and get high and come home to the free room and board.

You can be tough and I hope you will be. My parents went so far as to lock the door on my brother. Good lcuk.

Yes who ever told you that you can't just throw him out, he is not a minor and not owner of the property.

At worst you give him notice and evict him, but honestly, you change the locks while he is gone and hit his clothes on the porch.

He is only living there and drinking and not working and not going to school because you allow him to.

It is your choice, always has been.

But as stated, set a date for him to either be in school or be working.
And make him pay rent

Does anyone know where I can get a sample contract? My SD is 18 and seems to think that just because she starting paying $75 a month on 9/1/2010 that it gives her cart blanche to do as she pleases. For instance - I own the house (solely) and have told her that when her father and I go on vacation I will not allow her to stay at home alone. She feels since she pays $75 a monnth she's entitled to anythig she wants and doesn't have to do a damn thing - like help clean dishes; vacuum etc. She says she washes her plate and fork and that's enough. Her father and I have both said - what about helping with cleaning the dishes used to cook - she feels it's not her responsibility. I told her today that I will look for a contract and we will sit down and go over it - and if she doesn't like it she needs to find someplace else to live. I'm tired of her yelling screaming and acting like she owns the house. Her father told her last month that she needs to find someplace else to live because she's disrupting our lives with her behavior.

He is only 18, still a kid. Give him time for petes sake. I know SO MANY people who are 18 - 20 who are in College and are so deep into debt ($40,000+ in loans) because they were pressured to start University upon graduating HS that they don't even know what they want to do. And they can't drop out because they can't afford to pay loans. So give him time, he is 18 *adult yes* but still a kid. Do you HONESTLY think he would be able to afford to live on his own? With how expensive it is these days just to rent an apartment, he'd be back within a month. Unless you want to see him living on the streets... I could not sink that low to kick a child out of the house because they turned "18" that is sick. I'm sorry.

Tell him get the **** out

Or make him pay rent and make rules such as not coming home drunk and stoned