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    mfen0023's Avatar
    mfen0023 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 30, 2010, 12:27 AM
    What should I do?
    Hey. I have been with this guy nearly 2 yrs. Really our character is totally different. He is very unsociable and does not like to go out with some other friends, he avoids where there are people like festas, parties, clubs etc.. He likes to be alone with me always. I am an opposite, I like to go out and socialize. Another thing I don't like is that he lives day by day, he doesn't show me that he wants to work to built our future, he works full time, almost spend every wage. He is very jealous. But on the other side I know he loves me a lot and I do as well. I don't know why I do love him but when I come to split from him I really find it hard. It feels like I get used to him and I am finding really hard to change my lifestyle. I have no friends because I lost contact with them when I met him. I am going mad . *** help.I am 20 and he is 23
    bgmnd2010's Avatar
    bgmnd2010 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #2

    Sep 30, 2010, 01:05 AM
    You have described him as unsociable, spends every wage,jealous, so no wonder you split with him . Why do you want to get back to him just because you have no friends and you have got used to the lifestyle? If you lost touch with your friends did you try Facebook, orkut etc? Even if you can't contact people you can make new friends, change your home location or place you frequent . Let things be and settle down. Don't rush into going back..
    If you want to be the way you were before him its not easily possible because a lot of experience has changed your life. It need not be the same, but will get better with time.
    Good luck
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #3

    Sep 30, 2010, 04:07 AM
    His devotion and jealousy and desire to be alone just with you was probably charming at first, but that isn't what love is about. You may be in love with that, rather than HIM. You are too young to give up a social lifestyle and friends. You need to make the break, even if it hurts.
    As you get older you will discover that love has a lot to do with everyday things - what friends and family you both like, where you like to go and what to do or eat or watch or listen to, what plans you want for the future, whether to save money or spend it, children, all that. There's nothing wrong with asking all those questions even during the early romance.
    Devorameira's Avatar
    Devorameira Posts: 2,461, Reputation: 981
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    #4

    Sep 30, 2010, 08:37 AM

    Since this is posted in the Divorce section, do I assume that you are married and considering a divorce?

    I think the main problem with relationships, is that people often assume things should be done 'together', but there is nothing wrong with having a life "outside" of the relationship. If your man doesn't want to go out, why not make plans to go out with other people (friends, family... ) and have fun?

    Your man is jealous and controlling, which aren't great traits at all. You haven't done anything wrong, so why allow him to punish you continually?

    If you're smart, you'll move on and get back out there into your world of family and friends.

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