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    spinster's Avatar
    spinster Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jan 19, 2007, 08:58 AM
    Separated but not yet filed for divorce
    My husband and I have separated but not yet filed for divorce yet, I know he has another girlfriend and has gotten her pregnant. But I am not allowed to see any men. He tells me that he has a private investagator following me around and has pictures on me. He is sending annymous e-mails to all my friends and myself. He wants to make sure that I am left all alone. He said I have reuined his life so now he wants to do the same to me. I don't know what to do... I feel so trapped. He just will not leave me alone and keeps up with the threats.
    The reason I left him was because of his temper and he had cheated on me and now he wants to say it was me that has cheated on him... I'm so confused. He controlled me when I was living with him and he is still trying to do it. He will not let me go.


    So confused
    mr.yet's Avatar
    mr.yet Posts: 1,725, Reputation: 176
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Jan 19, 2007, 09:26 AM
    Start by filing for the divorce, than keep a log and all emails or anything he send to you.

    Carry a digit camera, a recorder with you at all times.

    Protect yourself, it is not your fault, he is simply playing the mind game with you.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #3

    Jan 19, 2007, 09:28 AM
    What are you waiting for? Get an attorney and file for divorce. Employ your own PI and get the goods on him.
    bronzebabe's Avatar
    bronzebabe Posts: 333, Reputation: 62
    Full Member
     
    #4

    Jan 21, 2007, 09:08 AM
    While I agree that you need to file for divorce, he has No right to tell you that you can't date! Please file for divorce, and be careful who you date next!
    spoiledangel's Avatar
    spoiledangel Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #5

    Jan 28, 2007, 08:58 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by spinster
    my husband and i have seperated but not yet filed for divorce yet, i know he has another girlfriend and has gotten her pregnant. but i am not allowed to see any men. he tells me that he has a private investagator following me around and has pictures on me. he is sending annymous e-mails to all my friends and myself. he wants to make sure that i am left all alone. he said i have reuined his life so now he wants to do the same to me. i dont know what to do..... i feel so trapped. he just will not leave me alone and keeps up with the threats.
    the reason i left him was because of his temper and he had cheated on me and now he wants to say it was me that has cheated on him...... im so confused. he controlled me when i was living with him and he is still trying to do it. he will not let me go.


    so confused
    There is nothing he can do and if he accuses you of cheating without proof that is illegal. He can't do that it is not valid and you can file a necessary divorce talk to your lawyer you do not need him in order to divorce him and there's nothing he can do about it.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #6

    Jan 29, 2007, 06:15 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by spoiledangel
    There is nothing he can do and if he accuses you of cheating without proof that is illegal. He can't do that it is not valid and you can file a necessary divorce talk to your lawyer you do not need him in order to divorce him and theres nothing he can do about it.
    There are some slight inaccuracies here. The ex can accuse her all he wants. The only way it becomes illegal is if he swears to it in court.

    She does need him to obtain the divorce, both parties need to sign off on it. Except n cases of abandonment. But she doesn't need him to file.
    valinors_sorrow's Avatar
    valinors_sorrow Posts: 2,927, Reputation: 653
    I regard all beings mostly by their consciousness and little else
     
    #7

    Jan 29, 2007, 06:22 AM
    I've read both dramatic threads about your marriage. Until you act like an adult and take responsibility for where you are, all the help in the world won't help. There is a ton of help available in the world but when you are unwilling to avail yourself of it, then the problem is no longer him, but you instead. Its really that simple. This is not meant to be harsh but rather truthful and therefore hopefully helpful. If he is to be held accountable for what he does, then so must you for what you do or don't do... to be fair about it.

    What actions are you willing to take? And if the answer is nothing, then I regret that there really isn't anything further to offer you as far as I can see.

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