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    Jellybean1624's Avatar
    Jellybean1624 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 20, 2011, 05:21 AM
    I'm scared of my Husband and need to leave for me and my 3 year old son
    My husband is very verbal abusive with me in front of my son and is very mean I need to get away but, he makes all of the money he made me loose my job years ago and now I have to depend on him. I'm scared because my 83year mom lives with us and I can support us. What do I do?
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #2

    Dec 20, 2011, 06:26 AM
    Did you mean to say 'I can't support us?'
    What country are you in?
    Do you think he would be violent if you said you were getting a divorce/leaving?
    Generally you file for divorce, and that means getting a lawyer, which does cost money. Often the lawyer will wait for the final fees, because you can get them in the settlement, but you usually need a retainer (deposit).
    Some wives stay while proceedings are going on and others leave. Is there anyone who can take the 3 of you for several months?
    Is there anything about his yelling that can be resolved, any problems at work, or finances, or anything that counseling could help with?
    I hope you answer all 5 questions below.
    susangpyp's Avatar
    susangpyp Posts: 258, Reputation: 73
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    #3

    Dec 29, 2011, 10:29 PM
    It's hard to answer this without knowing where you're from, but my suggestion would be to call your local bar association, legal aid office or women's organizations and explain your situation. They may be able to refer you to a few lawyers who can help out or who do pro bono work for people in these kinds of situations.

    In certain states, such as California, there are family law facilitators at the local courthouse to help you with paperwork to file for temporary orders and also fee waivers if you qualify.

    Whether through a lawyer or on your own, you can usually file for temporary orders that would include support for you and your child and removing him from the house.

    Without means for a retainer, you may need to do more footwork and make more phone calls to find what is available to you in your area.

    If you are concerned about safety, please read the safety planning tips from the National Council on Domestic Violence here: Safety Planning
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #4

    Dec 31, 2011, 08:12 AM
    Any advice is pretty much worthless without knowing where you are. Are you in the US? Somewhere else?
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