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    animalgirl2000's Avatar
    animalgirl2000 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 19, 2013, 01:22 PM
    Was I too harsh on him?
    Recently a guy asked me out in front of our whole pre-algebra class. Everyone stared at me. I said "no. never." I didn't mean to sound so harsh. Then ever since then I felt guilty about it. Was I too harsh on him?

    (p.s. I said "no. never" because I'm not ready to date. The bible said to wait until after the bloom of youth to avoid heartbreak and so that's what I'm doing. We're only in the 8th grade! Besides. Even if I weren't waiting until after the bloom of youth he's still not the kind of guy I would date.) Thanks for helping. :)
    smearcase's Avatar
    smearcase Posts: 2,392, Reputation: 316
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    #2

    Nov 19, 2013, 02:27 PM
    He chose to ask you in front of a crowd, so he set himself up to fail and caused his own embarrassment.
    Oliver2011's Avatar
    Oliver2011 Posts: 2,606, Reputation: 746
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    #3

    Nov 19, 2013, 02:30 PM
    Were you too harsh? Nope. You taught him a lesson he probably will remember his whole life, and that isn't a bad thing at all.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,299, Reputation: 5645
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    #4

    Nov 19, 2013, 03:03 PM
    I'm going to respectfully disagree with my colleagues here. I do think you were too harsh. It took a lot of courage for this boy to ask you in front of God and everybody. You could have been much nicer just by saying something along the lines that you are concentrating on your grades and you aren't ready to date yet.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,792, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #5

    Nov 19, 2013, 05:13 PM
    I thought you were rude. You could have said, thanks but I'm not ready. You're probably feeling bad because you should. There is a way to talk to people. .
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
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    #6

    Nov 19, 2013, 05:27 PM
    An apology goes a long way. I suggest you should apologize in front if at least one other person, and let word get around that you did. Just say something like, "you caught me off guard asking me out in front of people, and I am sorry I sounded harsh and mean. I just don't want to date at all until I am a lot older".
    Itsmebytheway's Avatar
    Itsmebytheway Posts: 16, Reputation: 3
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    #7

    Dec 2, 2013, 07:27 PM
    I'm sorry but you sounded mean.. I know you were shocked and words like that just naturally comes out without much thinking.. But if he had the courage to confess to you in a crowd of people means he really does like you.. He and the rest probably misunderstood you. And you should clear that up. If you were him, and you confessed to a guy but got rejected like that how would you feel? So I guess an apology or explanation is needed.. if you can't say it at least type it through Facebook status or whatever. Hope that helps :)
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,318, Reputation: 5972
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    #8

    Dec 2, 2013, 08:24 PM
    I agree that you sounded mean. It takes a lot of courage to ask someone out, and to do it in front of the whole class, that took a lot of guts. He took a chance, and you cut him down in front of everyone. Things like that stick with you for a lifetime.

    You should apologize. Me, I'd do it in front of the whole class. It will be hard, and embarrassing, but not nearly as embarrassing as what you did to him.

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