[chicagows23]

I am a female in love with a married woman. The last time we went out I wanted to end the relationship, but she said "everything is temporary and that she may knock on my door one day" Do I wait or move on? And do you think she loves me as much because she made that statement?:confused:

[I wish]

It doesn't matter what she says. She's married so she's off limits.

Don't be the person who she cheats with.

[Justwantfair]

You have to do the right thing in this situation.
You are the real one suffering, instead of finding a happy, healthy, monogamous relationship, you are left waiting and holding the bag as someone's mistress.
So now you aren't dating or fulfilling any of your goals and she is getting the best of both worlds.
A husband and family to show off and probably a sexual and emotional relationship with you, all of her needs are met, while you are ignoring your own needs.
You shouldn't have started the affair or been involved since the beginning and now the consequence is the pain of doing the right thing, but better late then never.
Stop paying for her happiness.

[N0help4u]

You broke it off with her and she said 'everything is temporary... '
So you would consider sitting around waiting indefinitely for somebody that is married and
YOU broke up with... for what?
She is married... move on.

[Ash123]

I have seen this first hand.
One day you may be friends, but a couple... not likely.
Married women with identity or marrital issues give themselves permission to sleep with another woman who they feel bonded with...
In the end it helps neither them or you...
Her marriage may not last forever but don't expect you to be the answer.
Her life is not going to end up in a position to be
In a committed lesbian relationship.

[chicagows23]

Thanks to all. I already knew the answer.
Just needed reaffirmation.
;)

[chicagows23]

Threads merged for all the details.

If a woman doesn't say "leave me alone", does that indicate that she still wants me in her life?

Also I found her old high school yearbook on eBay, should I give it to her as a present?

Questions that may seem trivial, but are important to me.

I want her as my lifelong friend and that is the norm for me. I have lifelong friends one for 26 years and another 15 years. And this married woman 8 years.:)

[amicon]

What HAS she said? And what kind of friendship are you hoping for?is it a platonic friendship with a married woman?

[chicagows23]

She talks to me, laughs at my jokes and she says she is not mad at me. I work with her in the same department.

And yes a platonic friendship is what I want above all else.

But, there are those moments when she seems she doesn't want to acknowledge me and I feel as if she would rather I would disappear

[amicon]

Ask her if she wants a friendship.

[chicagows23]

Should I give her the yearbook I found on eBay?

[amicon]

Again. Ask her first.

[Loi13]

Part of the problem here is a lack of specifics. What are these moments when she doesn't seem to want to acknowledge you? What specifically does she do?
I wouldn't suggest asking her unless you have known her to be honest in the past.
Also, is it possible that she's worried that you are coming on to her, a married woman and is trying to let you down? If you believe this is the case, you could try telling her of your true intentions (only a platonic friendship). Maybe mentioning that a friend raised the possibility.
As a last resort, you can try, "disappearing" for a while and see if she tries to contact you. Just don't send emails, phone her, or hang out in places where you see her.
Before you do this though, please post more information about the situation.

[chicagows23]

So u want the specifics. There is no rhyme or reason to the time and or situation when she ignores me. So I can't really give u specifics. U would think there would be a pattern.

But she is very spontaneous. Also I know she is on Cymbalta. And when I asked why she wouldn't tell me, just that she was getting bad headaches.

Back to my main question if someone wanted you to leave them alone why wouldn't they say so?

And I have given her space. She is the one that initiates the contact. And then she seems to withdraw at times.

Just can't make sense of it all.:confused:

[talaniman]

Your ex lovers that have broken up, so leave her alone, and don't give her anything. Your trying to force something on someone, who doesn't want it.

[N0help4u]

Giving her her year book is just a feeble attempt at trying to see her again.
She is married so her ryhme and reason is that you are seconds that she may bother with when she doesn't have her life going on.
Why do you want to be seconds to a married woman?

[amicon]

Threads merged I gather.so latest thread was a bit confusing.