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    kira1357's Avatar
    kira1357 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 13, 2012, 06:05 AM
    Relationship issue
    My name is kira. Me and my ex went out for almost 9 months and the reason he kindve broke it off wasdue to his depression. His depression started in December (we started dating in june). In January he said he wanted to b friends and it was not understandable and ver shocking to me to I immediately called him and went over his house. We talked and he changed the break up to a break (with hope we might get bac together). I eventually stopped crying, we had makeup sex, and he went out to the gym to burst off some steam with his friends. I was pretty hurt but the term break wasn't what I expected it to be. Trust me, I freaked out and asked every possible thing I could. For example: him wanting to see other women, using the break as an excuse not to full break up and hurt my feelings,and simply not liking me anymore. He said neither of those things and that he needed space to get through his depression. It was very confusing too me as to why he said depression. I thought of it more as an excuse, but let it go and went on. I wanted tob there for him. After all of that he was giving me so much more attention and being such a sweetheart. And then he shut down again. This time one and a half months later (in march). He started not to call me names like sweeetie anymore. And I got sad and broke out in a cry. So I called him and he said just because he's not calling methose names its all in my head. And then I called him again to ask where we were and he said we were just friends. I got so upset again. Talked to him again this time he felt bad again. Brought me to a very fancy restaurant. He dropped me off home extra early and ssed he might go out drinking with his friends. Then I called him to ask if he was okay. He asked me to come over because I started crying again because I didn't know what to tell my parents. We just cuddled on the couch. When I was going to leave he gave me the strongest hugs ever and when I looked up at him he started crying. I hugged him one more time and left. And then one more time in march I said he was being confusing. He said he wanted to be just friends. Meanwhile he takes me to a fancy restaurant, hold my hand in public (in the previous month), and still try to keep the sexual relations going(we only had one by the way or not that many). Now in the present he is trying to be as friendly as possible which I as a woman hate. I would rather him be confusing and just be happy with that. Yesterday we went out for lunch. He paid. In his car he tried to do this weird hi five thing with me and I for whatever reason grabbed his hand, and he slowly let go and I noticed he looked away and pretended to yawn. Then we got bac to his house. He wanted to rest so I had to go home. He gave me a hug. Mine was a very big hug. But he was the first to let go. Which made me sad but I noticed his stepdad was there so he prbaby didn't want to sho too much emotions. All right thts pretty much the story sorry for everything just want to tell you guys what is exactly going on here. The main question is what should I do? Should I wait this out to see what happens? Or not? Because I don't know if he already knows this but I love him a lot he said he loves me toobut I'm pretty sure I love him more.
    Stellaw's Avatar
    Stellaw Posts: 171, Reputation: -1
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Mar 31, 2012, 02:51 PM
    Don't think too much. Just because he was the one who let go first, it doesn't mean that he's not that into you but it also doesn't mean that he's crazy about you. You just will never know until things are properly communicated.

    You have to be there for him because he needs you and he trusts you. If you really love someone, just love him even if all your efforts aren't reciprocated. Do you think he loves you even if lesser than how you truly feel for him? Then that should be enough. Everybody has his way of loving someone and it doesn't matter how but what matters is there's love.

    I think waiting has more advantages because if you wait and not stressed about your relationship with him, you'll have more time for yourself and your loved ones, you'll have a clearer head and perspective, and you'll end up making better decisions.

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