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    joka_moka's Avatar
    joka_moka Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 3, 2011, 08:06 AM
    Player-relationship?
    Hi, I recently met a guy at a random place. Anyway, I saw him again at this place, and we were just casually chatting and joking. Later on he starts being a bit flirty, like mirroring, touching my arm etc. I didn't mind, he seems really nice and is quite good looking. Within conversation, he mentioned he was dating some girl of a friend of friend I know like 3-4 yrs ago. That was all. It was all going OK, but then before I left, he asked if I'd be coming to this other place next time, and if he can come and get me? But I wasn't able to go then, so I said no sorry. See you another time.

    My question? Is he coming on too fast? Could he be a player? Or does he want to get to know me slowly but casually? What do I do to make more happen? Because, I feel like I may like him too, though I want more than casual in my relationships? Thanks:)
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
    Entomology Expert
     
    #2

    Sep 3, 2011, 08:09 AM
    He's dating someone else... he told you this... but then he's flirting with you and coming on to you. Is he a player? What do you think?
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
    Marriage Expert
     
    #3

    Sep 3, 2011, 08:51 AM
    Within conversation, he mentioned he was dating some girl of a friend of friend I know like 3-4 yrs ago.
    Was dating someone or is dating someone? If he is currently in a relationship, walk away.

    If he has ended the previous relationship, how long ago did it end? If it ended yesterday and he is trying to pick you up today, then chances are he has high turn-over rate for girlfriends. Not necessarily a 'player', but not very aware of any pattern he may be developing.

    Only you know if he was coming on too fast. It's a personal preference.

    I'd proceed with caution and if you see him again, keep it casual. Get to know more about him and his motives. He may be looking for fling. He may be clueless about how to engage in conversation with someone he finds attractive without coming across as a 'player'. If you want to take a chance, you can ask him out which might be what he was fishing for when he asked about the other place.

    Keep your options open at this point. There may be another person who will catch your eye before you see him again.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Sep 3, 2011, 01:57 PM
    As a guy who dated them all, keep it friendly, casual, and fun until you know exactly who and what you are dealing with. My advice is have fun, but don't go looking for more than casual fun with a stranger. Expecting a relationship at this point is plain crazy. You may have feelings, but you have NO facts by which to base a good decision on.

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