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    Susieq4's Avatar
    Susieq4 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 1, 2012, 12:50 PM
    Hurt
    I was with my boyfriend for 4 years, every time we got into a fight he would run back to his ex, but always came back to me. We got into a fight again and he ran back to her, this time it's has been longer then usual,he still has not been back. I love him so much, how do I just let him go for good?
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #2

    Jul 1, 2012, 06:20 PM
    Remember the hurt he has caused you and know he keeps leaving and coming back because you let him.
    Perhaps he is still in love with her. That ought to hurt.
    When you get tired of all this back and forth you'll stop taking him back.
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    #3

    Jul 1, 2012, 09:13 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    Remember the hurt he has caused you and know he keeps leaving and coming back because you let him.
    Perhaps he is still in love with her. That ought to hurt.
    When you get tired of all this back and forth you'll stop taking him back.
    He tells me he only does it to hurt me, and that he needs someone to talk too.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #4

    Jul 2, 2012, 07:38 AM
    Well do you want to continue to be hurt by him? He knows he hurting you.
    Let him talk to his ex.
    Don't take him back again. You need to start loving yourself more. He obviously does not love or respect you.
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    #5

    Jul 2, 2012, 10:24 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    Well do you want to continue to be hurt by him? He knows he hurting you.
    Let him talk to his ex.
    Don't take him back again. You need to start loving yourself more. He obviously does not love or respect you.
    He makes me think I'm not worth anything and I can't get anybody else, I cry all the time, I push my children away just so they don't see me hurt. I just want to no why does he treat me like this after 4 years?
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    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #6

    Jul 2, 2012, 12:24 PM
    Because he's an a** .
    Take care of yourself and your kids and let him stay gone.
    He is no doubt getting on her nerves and hurting her too.
    Susieq4's Avatar
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    #7

    Jul 4, 2012, 12:26 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    Because he's an a** .
    Take care of yourself and your kids and let him stay gone.
    He is no doubt getting on her nerves and hurting her too.
    Should I fight for him to come back to me ? Or just let him go? I really do love him
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    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #8

    Jul 4, 2012, 07:10 AM
    Why would you fight for someone who hurts you and leaves you at every whim? Are you addicted to pain and drama?
    Take care of yourself and your kids. He's not worth fighting for.
    Keep this man out of your life.
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    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #9

    Jul 4, 2012, 07:57 AM
    He acts like this because he can - he leaves, moves in with (and presumably has sex with) another woman, comes back - and you take him in.

    Maybe this works for you but you admit you avoid or ignore your children so they don't see your hurt and/or don't get hurt. If you can't or won't leave for yourself, leave for the sake of your children.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
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    #10

    Jul 4, 2012, 12:43 PM
    Is it really worth it? You're fighting for something that may never happen. He hasn't shown any ability to prove you with any stability, so why are you constantly bashing your head on the wall over and over and over again?

    I'm going to turn this around on you. When will you have enough of him so that you can move on?
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    #11

    Jul 5, 2012, 03:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by I wish View Post
    Is it really worth it? You're fighting for something that may never happen. He hasn't shown any ability to prove you with any stability, so why are you constantly bashing your head on the wall over and over and over again?

    I'm going to turn this around on you. When will you have enough of him so that you can move on?
    I'm trying,I love him with all my heart but don't want to hurt anymore, I don't even no if it would feel right being with someone else, but I can tell u right now he don't care if he hurts me.
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    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #12

    Jul 5, 2012, 03:43 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Susieq4 View Post
    I'm trying,I love him with all my heart but don't want to hurt anymore, I don't even no if it would feel right being with someone else, but I can tell u right now he don't care if he hurts me.
    You don't need to be with anybody else right now or even think about it. But you do need to leave this guy alone. He hurts you and does not care and this also keeps you from being the mom you should be. The guy is a loser. Think about your kids, concentrate on them and leave this guy alone.
    Remember he cannot continue to hurt you without your permission. You may have been an unwilling victim the first time, but you are volunteering for pain now.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
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    #13

    Jul 6, 2012, 07:48 AM
    It's hurting me to see you drag this out. Think about it this way, once you cut your ties with it, it will hurt in the beginning, but at least both of you will learn to recover and move on with your lives.

    But if you stay together, you're dragging out the pain, that's even worse isn't it?

    Why not give each other a chance at happiness with someone else, rather than being unhappy together.

    Life is so short. The more time you waste being unhappy with him, the less time you have being happy with someone else. And that someone else is just around the corner, why are you keeping that person waiting?
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