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    pkjutis's Avatar
    pkjutis Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 30, 2009, 09:53 AM
    How to ask for space.
    I have been dating a great guy for about 3 months. I also am recently divorced, but separated for about a year in a half. My boyfriend and I have been spending a lot of time together, as we have a lot in common. Unfortunately, due to spending a lot of this time together I am starting to see some attributes of his personality that are not really what I see as positive. I really enjoy hanging out, but I think that we should be spending a lot less time together. I think that this would not destroy a possibly great thing. How do I convey this to him honestly and without making it seem harsh?
    HistorianChick's Avatar
    HistorianChick Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 825
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    #2

    Apr 30, 2009, 09:56 AM

    I don't think there is a middle ground.

    If he was on here asking what to do about his girlfriend who asked for space, he would be advised to go no contact and to move on.

    That's what I'll tell you. You explain to him what you said here and you move on. Don't lead him on, don't drag it out, you'll only hurt him and yourself.

    Make a clean break. It's the best thing for the both of you.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #3

    Apr 30, 2009, 10:17 AM

    It's just a case of not knowing him well enough. Now that you know him better, you are starting to see his flaws and can't really handle it.

    Why ask for space? You're just dragging out the inevitable. Space is not going to change his personality. Just end it now before you two have deeply committed to this relationship. No point dragging it out.

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