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sallyasdf · May 4, 2008, 05:58 PM

I have been going out with this guy for 2 weeks now and I really like him. But he is always trying to find a place for me and him to meet cause he wants to kiss, but I'm not ready for that yet. He always ask these other questions like has your x's ever touched your butt? then he's like well should they, I think that its just cause he's not experienced, but I'm not sure. Also it always seems like he's trying to impress me. What should I do??

justcurious55 · May 4, 2008, 06:34 PM

Have you made it clear that you're not ready for anything physical? If you have, dump him, he has no right to pressure you. If you haven't, then make it clear and if he still pressures you dump him.

Anytime anyone is doing anything at all to make you uncomfortable it's up to you to speak up and let them know you want them to stop. If you make your feelings clear and they continue their behavior, leave. Don't be around them anymore.

JBeaucaire · May 4, 2008, 08:18 PM

Words are amazing things. They carry information and instruction from the speaker to the hearer and result in "communication." It's really cool. Sometimes, though, you have to add a dose of strong tone to make the hearer understand they are "important words." Make sense.

OK, here we go: Take GUY's hands in yours when your alone and say, "I want to tell you something important. I am not sure you've ever heard this before, and I am glad you and I can talk and understand each other the way we do, OK? Here it is.

"I do not want you to look for private places to try and kiss me or touch me in ways I haven't already told is OK to do. I'm not ready to do that with you, but I like hanging around with you.

"I also no longer want you to bring up the issue yourself at all. You're not sensitive to my feelings on this at all, and I want it to completely stop for now. I need this from you.

"So we can keep hanging together as long as you promise to stop this immediately. I really hope you do understand. I totally want us to keep being together. What do you say?"

Listen carefully and calmly to what he says. If he gets upset or angry, DO NOT respond in kind. Remind him you understand he doesn't like this, but you need him to agree. If he can't, perhaps it would be better if you just went back to being friends and didn't have to worry about this stuff at all. Perhaps another girl he likes is more ready to do that stuff if it's so much more important to him than your feelings.

Good luck.