I am ready to date but no one wants me.
Asked Jul 30, 2008, 07:34 PM
I've been in college for a year and a half an absolutely no guys have noticed me. At all. And it makes me feel bad about myself. I don't think I'm ugly but I don't know. I try to be pretty. It's not something I can just walk up to someone and ask about. Friends will probably be nice and say "Of course you're pretty." And strangers will probably say "I don't know. You look alright I guess." Throughout my grade school years I've never had a boyfriend. No guy has ever asked me. I don't think it has anything to do with how you look, honestly. Because I see unattractive girls with very attractive guys. I would think my personality is good. I mean, I think it's okay. Plus I'm smart and I like to do things. I'm active. I love reading. Long walks are great on weekends. I exercise every day to stay in shape, and I even go to the club with my friends. Actually, when I think about it, the gym is a cesspool for meeting people. My friends tell me all about how men have gone up to them and talked to them and asked them for their numbers. It hasn't happened to me once at the gym. Or anywhere else for that matter. I haven't received so much as a look out of the corner of the eye. It might be my body. I'm not very curvy. And I do look kind of young (even though this is a college campus gym and everyone who goes is at least 18). But my friends are curvy and mature-looking. And I know that's not the right way to attract a guy but it suuuure helps lol. But anyway...
I'll be honest. I don't dress very sexy. I don't like that kind of thing. Tight pants and small shirts are uncomfortable. And they send the wrong message (that I want men to look at my butt or breasts). So I don't wear them. I'm not glamour girl. But still. I see girls who dress down even more than I do and they still have boyfriends. I have a lot of friends. A lot of people like me. But no guy-friend has ever taken it further than that. Matter of fact (and this is a funny, true story) My girlfriend and I were hanging out in a guy friend of ours' room. He and I had a lot in common. We both love apple computers and the same kind of burgers. He's sort of a loser (and so am I if I'm perfectly honest) so we click really well. Anyway, I fell asleep on his bean bag and when I woke up, he and my friend were kissing. They later became an item. Now you have to understand what kind of person my friend is. Now SHE'S a glamour girl. She's got the bust and the butt and a tiny waist. She wears tight pants and is current with all of the most recent music and gossip. She's also a 4.0 student (I know, perfect :) ). But she's the type of girl who gets (and has gotten in the past) football players. And the guy is no fool. He wouldn't get with a girl just because of her body. Obviously, while I was a sleep, she executed some sort of seductive skill that resulted in her snagging him. But not on her own. I know her and she is not one to make the first move. So he had to have done something or said something for this to happen. Now the relationship didn't last because they were clearly opposites. But what made him pursue her and not me, when he and I have so much in common?
I don't want to throw myself at guy but, at the same time, I don't want to continue to be of no interest to them. I just don't understand why everyone I've ever known has been in a relationship at least once and I haven't even received my first kiss. I keep in shape. I take care of my hair and face. I dress in slightly baggy clothes only because I don't want men to judge me by the way I look. I have a lot of friends. So why don't guys like me? I don't even get cat calls on the street when I walk to Barnes and Nobles. My friends do all the time when they walk to the mall or something. Some guys even stop their cars for them. I've never gotten a "Hey baby" or anything. Not that I'd actually respond to that kind of a approach, but their casual interest will at least let me know every now and then that the opposite sex finds me attractive. What more can I do? Someone people say "Ohh your time will come soon enough. Just wait a bit longer." But when I'm the ONLY girl in my circle of friends who has never been hit on, or in a relationship, or even kissed, it makes me feel... weird. Like there is something wrong with my but no one has told me about it yet. I don't want to be 40 and in the same situation. I don't want to change who I am and conform in this society where big butts and big breasts rule either but... what can I do?
Thank you in advance :)