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    Innocence123's Avatar
    Innocence123 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 12, 2009, 07:05 PM
    Should I be banned because my Friend shoplifted?
    Ok recently, I was banned from the mall because my friend I was hanging out with stole two hundred dollar swimsuit and a one hundred dollar dress. I told her not to take the stuff but she didn't listen, later on while leaving the store, the police came to us and sent us to the back room. There we were questioned and told that we are banned from the mall for 6 months, yet I didn't steal anything. It's just the fact that I was with her they pulled me aside also. I also have to go to juvenile court with her! But is that far that I get banned for her actions? Can anyone help me find out how I could get back into the mall. I am only 13 years old and I was hanging out with the wrong crowd, Wolfchase Galleria is a MAJOR part of my ife.
    Help?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Apr 12, 2009, 07:13 PM

    Of course you stole it with her, you knew she had it, did not stop her, stayed with her, you did not go to a clerk and report the illegal activity,

    You were a partner in the crime and can be sentenced to the same punishment she gets

    You are really lucky it is only 6 months, in most cases it would be for so many years.

    So being banned is just the easy park, you may face fines, payments to the store and probation because of this
    Innocence123's Avatar
    Innocence123 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Apr 12, 2009, 07:16 PM

    But I was trying to walk away, and she walked away with me, all I wanted to do was leave her.. but she noticed I was walking and followed
    Can I not talk to the mall people so I can't be banned or something?
    0rphan's Avatar
    0rphan Posts: 1,282, Reputation: 240
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    #4

    Apr 13, 2009, 08:05 AM

    Where I work it's exactly the same, if you are caught stealing, you are banned indefinitely and in some cases prosecuted.

    If you are in a group but you personally did not steal is of no relevance, you are considered equally to blame as you were part of that group at the time.

    I think you should seriously consider who you hang out with in future as you will be the innocent party... so to speak, but still be tarnished with the same reputation, which will become well known throughout the retail industry.

    Our reputation is priceless, therefore should be protected at all costs as this could affect what we are allowed to become in our future years,whether it's gaining a best friend or a position of trust.

    Theft is not something that can be kept quiet.. bad news travells fast.
    Innocence123's Avatar
    Innocence123 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:20 PM
    But, can I not talk to the manager/owner of the mall to allow me to get back in in less than 6 months? I've learned my lesson, I know who not to hang out with anymore, I just don't want to stay in my house, I hate this place!
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #6

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:29 PM

    You could talk to your parents.

    The manager/owner is unlikely going to lift the restriction.
    Innocence123's Avatar
    Innocence123 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:35 PM

    My parents know I didn't do anything, it's the fact that I was there, my mom doesn't know if she can talk to the manager at all.
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #8

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:38 PM

    There is your answer, I am sorry you were banned, consider it a hard lesson learned.
    ballengerb1's Avatar
    ballengerb1 Posts: 27,378, Reputation: 2280
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    #9

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:44 PM

    You can always ask their head of security to reconsider your situation but they will likely treat you as an accomplice. They can ban you for almost anything, a mall is not considered a public building.
    Innocence123's Avatar
    Innocence123 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:46 PM

    Ballengerb, do you think id have to be with my mom when and if she goes to head of security?
    HistorianChick's Avatar
    HistorianChick Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 825
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    #11

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:46 PM

    Ever heard the expression "guilty by association?" This is a perfect case and point.

    You are guilty because you were with the person that stole. You don't have to steal something to get in trouble. If you were with her, you can be sentenced as an accomplice.

    Sure, you can talk to the manager. But, you may face more trouble if you go to the mall - even just to talk.

    I'd find a different place to hang out at for the six months and consider yourself very lucky.

    PS - I was an Assistant Manager of a retail store in the mall at one time. If people in groups shoplifted, the entire group was banned. No exceptions. Sorry.
    ballengerb1's Avatar
    ballengerb1 Posts: 27,378, Reputation: 2280
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    #12

    Apr 13, 2009, 12:47 PM

    It would help o have mom with you.
    thewiseoldwoman's Avatar
    thewiseoldwoman Posts: 28, Reputation: 9
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    #13

    Apr 16, 2009, 08:56 PM

    It is standard to be treated equally guilty as the one who actually stole merchandise if you are with someone caught shoplifting. A lot of young people are foolish and think they can get away with shoplifting at least once, or even occasionally. Now you know that you will be considered guilty if one of your friends steals something while you are shopping together. Learn from this and make sure your friends know you don't want them coming along on your shopping trips if they are going to steal anything! Make that clear ahead of time each time you are shopping with friends.

    Six months is not a long time to be banned from going to the mall when you are 13 yrs old. Use this six months to really think hard about why you are guilty and why it isn't worth shoplifting and how you will never let this happen again.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #14

    Apr 16, 2009, 09:15 PM
    Wolfchase Galleria is tough on shoplifters (for those who don't know it's a mall in the Memphis area).

    You knew that she was stealing therefore, you are guilty by association in the eyes of Wolfchase.

    Consider yourself lucky that you only got 6 months. I've known teens who have gotten a year or more.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #15

    Apr 19, 2009, 10:35 AM

    You are very, very fortunate that you weren't also charged with shoplifting - I realize you are not in NY (which is where I am) but "here" you would have also been charged.

    You need other friends and if your whole life is the Mall, you need other hobbies.
    Meredith1978's Avatar
    Meredith1978 Posts: 120, Reputation: 9
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    #16

    May 1, 2009, 12:21 PM

    This is something I talked about with my thirteen year old. I'm sure you've heard that phrase "birds of a feather" or "guilty by association" unfortunately the company you keep reflects on how you are seen by others. To prevent this in the future, I would say pick better friends.

    Next time, have an escape, you could not control that she stole it, but you absolutely had control over staying with her after.

    I'd accept the consequence, really it isn't that bad. Next time you'll know better right?

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