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    adriana78's Avatar
    adriana78 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 22, 2006, 10:56 AM
    What are the first steps to get Sole Custody of my daughter
    Im a single parent and have been for the past almost 10 years. My daughter will be 10 this year. Her father has not been around since I was pregnant and have no knowledge of his whereabouts. My daughter has asked to change her last name with no influence of my part. Now I would like to do this for her even though she is 10 but is pretty aware of her situation. She is very aware she has a father and is not around and seems to take it pretty good. I know that maybe changing her last name will have an impact on the child support I am currently receiving. I really can do without it and at the same time if I'm going to be changing her last name I might as well go the whole 9 yards and receive full custody.
    What are the first steps I should take in doing so? Where can I go and research?
    CaptainForest's Avatar
    CaptainForest Posts: 3,645, Reputation: 393
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    #2

    Jan 22, 2006, 01:39 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by adriana78
    Her father has not been around since i was pregnant and have no knowledge of his whereabouts.

    Quote Originally Posted by adriana78
    I know that maybe changing her last name will have an impact on the child support i am currently receiving.

    Those statements seem to be contradictory.

    If you are receiving child support from this man, he is still a part of her life. Just because you don't know where he is means nothing. You can't ask for full legal custody when he is still apart of her life by paying money.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Jan 22, 2006, 02:12 PM
    Don't understand
    I will agree with the Capt, if you are getting a check every month, he is around. Next if he is paying the court, and the court is paying you, they know where he is, you only don't know since you have not asked the court.


    To get sole custody you will have to take her father back to court and sue for sole custody, if you win, there will be no further child support payments, ( now her father may be glad to do that if he is not coming around at all and just having to pay so he won't go to jail) He may jump at the chance to stop paying. Once you win full custody, the then you will have to file for a name change in court also ( separate court action and most likely in different court)

    So your first step would be contact an attorney and let them start the court filing.

    This is based on some assumed US laws, each state has its own laws and can vary
    insearch2008's Avatar
    insearch2008 Posts: 2, Reputation: 2
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    #4

    Mar 12, 2008, 07:44 AM
    Um no, not sure where you are getting your information. Filing for sole custody or changing a last name has NOTHING to do with whether a parent receives child support or not!!
    The mother could still get sole custody and the last name changed and the father still be liable to pay for child support. The father can of course contest any of this and file for custody his self which he couldn't get but he could get visitation.
    babieface85's Avatar
    babieface85 Posts: 332, Reputation: 24
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    #5

    Mar 13, 2008, 01:35 PM
    I would stay away from the courts as much as you can. It sounds like the father is leaving you and your girl alone and I would not want to risk changing that. Ask an attorney if she can go by your last name socially. If she can tell her she can make it legal at 18.
    insearch2008's Avatar
    insearch2008 Posts: 2, Reputation: 2
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    #6

    Mar 13, 2008, 02:59 PM
    True, you may not want to rock the boat since the father is paying support and leaving you alone like you want. If you go to court he may get angry and make things bad for you by trying to get joint custody/visitation. You already have sole custody except on paper. You can go by whatever name you want socially however since it is not her legal name schools and other places may still go by her official legal name. I would explain to your daughter why it might be risky to try and change it at this point in time and wait till she is bit older so that even if he tried anything like that she would have a say in whether she wanted to see her father. But only you know the father and how he might react if you petition for a name change and for legal full custody.

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