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Lory Jones · Dec 28, 2006, 09:23 PM

I, a single mother, left IL. With my 3 year old daughter, that I have sole custody of. We are living with her grand parents. Now her father (we have never been married) tells me that he is going to take me to court and demand that I bring her back. He only pays $50.00 per week and that is very irregular. I have been in Florida for two weeks and now he says he will not pay anything as he wants her back in IL. What rights do I have? He did agree that it was OK to move to Florida, but I have nothing in writing. I wanted a better life for my daughter and her grand parents are most willing to help obtain this goal. ( her grand parents are his dad and step mother).
Thanks!

RichardBondMan · Dec 28, 2006, 09:32 PM

Originally Posted by Lory Jones

I, a single mother, left IL. with my 3 year old daughter, that I have sole custody of. We are living with her grand parents. Now her father (we have never been married) tells me that he is going to take me to court and demand that I bring her back. He only pays $50.00 per week and that is very irregular. I have been in Florida for two weeks and now he says he will not pay anything as he wants her back in IL. What rights do I have? He did agree that it was ok to move to Florida, but I have nothing in writing. I wanted a better life for my daughter and her grand parents are most willing to help obtain this goal. ( her grand parents are his dad and step mother).
Thanks!

I believe he is on firm ground unless you have court approval. It might be sufficient to simply have his approval in writing but I am not an attorney. Also his failure to pay adequate child support is a separate issue from his right to see his child, fair or unfair as it may be. Simply put, it is my opinion, and nothing but my opinion, that you have taken away his right to see his child and the court will object vigorisly to your moving out of state, thus making it very impractical for him to see his child. I would consult an attorney for his opinion.

Lory Jones · Dec 28, 2006, 09:39 PM

I moved to Florida for a job. I could not find work in IL. And had no where to live. I could not count on him for child support and he agreed this would be best for her.

RichardBondMan · Dec 28, 2006, 09:43 PM

Lori, I understand fully, I commend you for taking care of your child, you asked, I gave you my best answer, I dislike immensely fathers who don't take care of their children, but really isn't it true that it's a long way from IL to FL and that it would be nearly impossible for him to visit his child. Don't get upset, just get some advice from an attorney, maybe the one that is most familiar with you and him and your situation. Good luck to you.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 28, 2006, 09:54 PM

First he can not just stop paying because you are doing this or that,

One rule of the court does not allow the other to stop their obligation.

Does your court order say you can't move without approval ? If so, then unless you can prove he gave it, he may have some legal ground, but the fact he allowed it for two years without compalining, it sounds more like he just wants to stop paying child support and thinks this gives him a reason.

If he stops paying child support you will have to hire an attorney to take him back to court, and there is nothing you can do to stop him from sueing in court about your move, he either will or he won't, if he does you will have to hire an attorney on it, Even if he has no chance of winning, he does have a right to try and sue for it,

educatedhorse_2005 · Dec 29, 2006, 12:29 AM

In most cases you need the fathers permission or a court document saying you could move.
Why not try and find a lawyer and get the court document unless you already have one.
In that case I wouldn't worry about the father.

I remember that when my sister wanted to move to a new state the ex said she couldn't.
Then she got a lawyer who helped her so she could move.
Hers was for a better job and life for the kids.

In most cases they will allow you to do whatever is best for you and the kid.

Good luck.

s_cianci · Dec 29, 2006, 08:51 AM

He can always take you to court. How the judge will rule is a different matter. Had there been a visitation order prior to your leaving for Fla? His taking you to court will, among other things, result in his being ordered to become current in his support payments and face a possible wage garnishment. He does not have the right to threaten to discontinue payments until you return to Ill. And that argument will not fly in court. If you can reasonably demonstrate that the move to Fla. Was in your child's best interests, the judge probably will not order you to return to Ill. However, you could be held responsible for travel costs associated with visitation.

Lory Jones · Dec 29, 2006, 07:38 PM

I appreciate the advise. The thing I forgot to mention is, I moved to Florida for a job. I could not find work in IL. And was offered a job from my daughters grand father. I start working on Tuesday. I am just so worried that he could make us return to IL. Thanks to all of you again for the advise.