[lulu_Smith099]

My brother Mathew use to be my best friend I told him everything and he told me everything.
The woman Nikki moved in with my mother and myself, we found that she lied a lot, she left out a folder with her police forms in it which I read and found she was convitewd of 8 chaqges of theft she stole over 8 thousand dollars.

My mum got her a job and they started to work together about a week in she started to tell lies about my mother.. any ways I had enough and I bashed her...

My brother then came down from New south wales for a holiday and my mum asked her not to get involved with him, (shes 43 and his 25). But she ended up ing him.

They have been together nhow for only 4 weeks and already they want to have a baby and get married...

Nikki and I have had so many fights over her lies and her treating my mum like..

Mum and I won't sperak to her so now my brothers says of we don't want to talk to her then he won't talk to us. He rang me and said that he ing hates me and he wishes my baby to come will die..

I miss him so much and it hurts every time he does this.

This isn't the first time he's chosen a girl over us, the last one use to hit my younger sister when no one was around but I saw it once then told mum who told mat who told us to get out of his life.

I want him around to be an uncle to my child and to be my brother again but this girl has him wraped around her finger he isn't allowed to spend his own money without asking her I'm just worried she will really hurt him but also when is enough ? How many more girls do we have to stand beofre he realizes that he hurts us?

What can I do to talk to him again he won't answer my phone calls or talk to me on the internet ? What can I do to get him to see things from both sides ?

[nitelight198073]

Tha is a toughie, I have a situatuion like that... my brother let a woman run his life... he never wanted kids and then all of a sudden she popped up pregnant and swore they both took precautions... then that one came and then another my brother did not want the first... his lifestyle changed so much and it hurts he is a jehovah's witness now and he use to love christmas now he no longer celebrates... He don't talk to us anymore... I usually see him once a year if that... I know how you feel sometimes you just got to let it go... no matter how you feel about the woman he is with... because I hate his... you just have to let it be because the way that you described her she won't be around for long.. so hang in he will come around and after do not tell him I told you so.. but do tell him your feelings about whena woman comes into his life you feel rejected and that he should believe family over a girlfriend

[artlady]

When someone is in love or believes they are in love,(sometimes it is infatuation) it is very difficult to convince them they are making a mistake..

The best thing you can do is stay out of it and hope that he comes to his senses on his own.You can't force him and he will only resent you for saying something negative about the girl he cares for.

He has to find out for himself who she is and no amount of pressure from you will help.You will only succeed in pushing him further away and you might damage your relationship for the long term.

He is old enough to make a choice ,even if it is a bad one.

I think you just need to give this time and if she is not the right person for him ,hopefully, he will find that out before she hurts him.

Some people have to learn things the hard way and there is nothing you can do except be there for them when they fall.

[N0help4u]

Yes you just need to leave him alone to make his own choices, live with them and learn from them. If you pressure him in any way he will only end up resenting you more. If you just let him go and learn the hard way about her then when things don't work out with her he will eventually find his way back to you.
Right now it is best to just stay out of the situation. Often when a family member bad mouths the choice of partner (no matter how true) it severs their chance of ever having a good relationship even after they break up. Let him know you are there for him no matter what and the ball is in his court for when he wants to be in contact with you when he wants.

[SaraKammeraad]

Congratulations on the baby. First think of it from is point of view he proably thinks that you and your mom are trying to keep him single for whatever reason. Second stop all the drama, it actually feeds into this fantasy. They will end up being together longer if it keeps going on. You should talk to her. The reason for this is because the more that your brother thinks that your trying to do what he asks the more that when she screws up he won't blame it on you and your mom. Yo don't have to like her, but eventually they will separate and when they do have an honest conversation with him about what he has said to you. You have a right to be mad and frustrated at that. I'm sure that he will apologize but on the in case he desn't don't let him be that involved in your life.
Especially your child's life, it's kind of a training that can be done for people with that personality, they learn to understand that they can not say hurtful things without consequences.