Ok wow I really need some advice, And I really need to vent. I haven't been able to sleep because I have so much guilt and I never felt so low in my entire life.

Okay I have a beautiful 3 month old baby. I got pregnant this time last year, Me and my boyfriend were having some issues as he was always a little abusive (calling me names and whatnot) At time time we both lived in Arizona so I decided to go back home to boston for a vaca, just for a week since it was spring break in college.. I got extremely wasted and ended up sleeping with my ex boyfriend. I didn't take my birth control for a few days so I found out I was pregnant when I got back to Arizona. My boyfriend was very happy and scared. The thing is that we always had unprotected sex and he never got me pregnant for the whole 2 years, and now all of a sudden I end up pregnant.. hmm

So I told the guy in Boston that it may be his and he was very shocked, but ended up saying he'd be there for me and him and he really wants to be a family and all this... so I continue going on not telling my current boyfriend it may not be his, I was so scared.. He really does scare me.. He has guns and if he found out it may not be his he probably would have freaked out on me and I didn't want to risk it being pregnant and living in a town that is legit 2 miles long..

Going on..

I told my boyfriend I wanted to move to Boston and I wasn't going to raise my kid in that little town so he picked up everything and moved here with me.. got an apartment and bought me a car.. the guilt continued but I tried to just think of my son and my health.. I didn't want to stress.. I finally gave birth to my son my boyfriend signed the birth certificate... and he came out looking somewhat like my ex.. he has his ears.. that's about it.. but EVERYONE says he looks like my current boyfriend..

Anyway my ex will not pay for a paternity test he says I have to tell my boyfriend and have him take one, he doesn't want me having an easy way out I seen him yesterday and he said hed pay for the test and then I call him and he says forget it I changed my mind have your boyfriend take it...

In my heart I believe this is my ex boyfriends kid but my question is.. How do I tell my boyfriend? I dug myself such a deep hole and now I have to tell him something that is not only going to break his heart but may be very bad in the end.. I do not want to get kicked out I have no family here they are all in Arizona.. If I get kicked out me and my son are homeless.. not to mention ill have no car.. and he mite hurt me

So how do I tell him? Where and when? Eh help me please I am in serious need to help...