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    emilyt's Avatar
    emilyt Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 29, 2009, 05:28 PM
    How can a mom react when a grown daughter talks rude to her
    My daughter has movedhome twice after each divorce. We have let her come back each time. She is going through a very difficult period. But she can be rude, disrespectful, and; its like she boards with us but not involved in our life at all. She works 3 jobs. But her attitude to me is hurtful, we both suffer from depression. How can I handle this. I am very sensitive which doesn't help me
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,302, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Nov 29, 2009, 05:29 PM

    Some kids come home as a boarder, I would assume she is paying rent, What level of involvement do you want.

    But it is very easy, merely tell her to move out
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #3

    Nov 29, 2009, 06:10 PM
    While it is never easy to have adult children move back into the home under these circumstances, it doesn't sound to me as though she is planning on staying very long. If she is working three jobs, she must have some sort of plan in place to be independent as soon as possible.

    She is going through a difficult time as you said, and you are both adjusting to living with each other again. You are both depressed people. Sometimes I wonder how people keep their heads above water with all the stress that weighs them down.

    You need to talk to her in a calm moment, just the two of you. If it were me, I would tell her that while I appreciate her working three jobs to get ahead and move on with her life, you really need her to be more aware of how her behaviour affects you, when she is rude and disrespectful. See if you can find common ground and an understanding of how long she is planning to stay.

    If you know that in another month she'll be in her own place, it will make life that much easier, because there will be light at the end of the tunnel.

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