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    missmeth18's Avatar
    missmeth18 Posts: 31, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Sep 28, 2006, 07:32 AM
    I had court today!!
    My sons father was brought in to the courtroom in an orange suit and shackles. He is disgusting. Anyway, he fought me on legal custody. The judge ordered me to have sole custody until the issue is (hopefully) resolved in mediation. The father wanted his name changed and I said no. The judge ordered him to have my last name and my son noe has 2 middle names, one being the fathers last name. He wanted the judge to set up a time limit as to his supervised visitations, but she left that up to me because he is in jail. He also wanted his sister to supervise, but I replied that my son will not know either of them and he would not feel safe. The father then blurted out that he does not feel comfortable at my moms. Then the judge got a little mad and said this is not about you. So we are going to mediation for that also. What happens in mediation?
    SINGLE4's Avatar
    SINGLE4 Posts: 189, Reputation: 33
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    #2

    Sep 28, 2006, 07:54 AM
    Hi Missmeth!

    Me and my ex-husband had a mediator to work out a custody issue! We sat in room with a "mediator" (which is usually and attorney) and my ex-husband and I just talked about our issues. The attorney didn't say a whole lot, he just sat their and took notes. These notes can only be used in court if approved by both parties.

    I went on-line and found this...

    Generally, the process consists of the following stages;

    An introduction by the mediator that includes establishing ground rules suggested by the mediators and the parties;
    The parties' 'telling their stories' in an uninterrupted manner;
    The mediator's asking questions to clarify the issues;
    The mediator's discovery of the parties' underlying interests/concerns related to the issues;
    The parties' generation of options that may resolve the dispute;
    The reality-testing of the options, leading to one option that best resolves the issues for all parties; and
    Memorialization of the resulting agreement in writing.
    The mediator has the role of guiding this process.

    People have used mediation extensively in virtually every type of conflict situation, ranging from commercial and family cases, to criminal matters involving juvenile and adult offenders meeting with victims to negotiate restitution. Mediation is increasingly ordered by judges in court cases where a collaborative approach to resolving a conflict is viewed as advantageous to the traditional adversarial process. In family cases, setting parties on a path of collaborative problem-solving is viewed as superior to traditional approaches where children, in particular, are harmed by the effects of protracted litigation.

    HOPE THIS HELPS!! GOOD LUCK!

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