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Lola279 · Mar 29, 2007, 10:12 AM

My significant other moved into my place with me last year. I already had 5 cats. They are all cats I found on the street and adopted. Hey, I was single!

When he moved in, he had a cat of his own plus his step-mom gave us another cat last year. So now we have 7. We do not plan on taking in any more cats. But now he says that we have too many cats and I have to give up at least three or he leaves me.

I agree we have too many cats but he knew coming into the relationship what to expect. We want to buy a house next year and we'll have more room for all of us. I simply cannot give away my cats as they are adults and no one wants to adopt adult cats and euthanasia is out of the question... I don't know what to do. He should have stayed at his place if he didn't like to have so many cats around... I don't want to loose him but I simply cannot find another solution.

What do you think?

phillysteakandcheese · Mar 29, 2007, 10:25 AM

Originally Posted by Lola279

... he says that we have too many cats and I have to give up at least three or he leaves me.

You can't have a particularly strong relationship if it can end because of too many cats... I suspect this is not really about cats at all.

First - Can you really care for that many cats? Do you have enough time and space to devote to 7 cats? Enough food? Clean litters? Can you handle the vet bills for all these animals?

If you can't, then you have to be a responsible pet owner and find homes for these animals where they can be cared for properly. It might be difficult, but necessary.

If you can realistically care for 7 cats, then you need to have an honest discussion with your significant other about what the problem really is. He most certainly knew what he was getting into when he brought his pets into the household. I find it hard to believe that he would be willing to throw away the relationship simply because there are 3 too many cats in the house.

mrscoltweaver · Mar 29, 2007, 11:29 AM

I don't know where you live but I just had the same problem! I recently "retired" from my veterinarian office job and had 4 cats and a 40 lb dog in the house. We decided to try and find a home for 2 not really thinking we could. We advertised in American Classifieds and were overwhelmed with responses. They got a home the day after the ad came out! I guess adopting from the animal shelter has gotten too expensive around here... try your paper with FREE TO GOOD HOME as the headliner, it worked for us!

froggy7 · Mar 29, 2007, 05:29 PM

"Free to good home" is really a bad idea. Some of the people who will come by and get those pets will present themselves and kind decent people looking for a pet for their family, when they really are looking for bait for training fighting dogs, or animals to sell to labs. Yep, there are some really scummy people out there. Plus, even if they are good people, if they can't afford some minimal amount to adopt the animal, will they be able to afford the other costs associated with taking care of a pet?

Also, I have to wonder about this boyfriend. He moves into a house with 5 cats already, and brings two more into the equation, yet it's 3 of _her_ cats that need to go? I don't see him offering to get rid of his cats, and that sends up a flag to me.

shygrneyzs · Mar 29, 2007, 05:35 PM

There are scummy people who go to shelters too. You cannot help it.

However, I agree with Philly here - this is most likely not about too many cats. Especially since your boyfriend knew about the cats before he moved in. If the cats mean that much to you, keep the cats. If your boyfriend means more to you, keep him. But I would ditch the boyfriend - you can always find another guy - a good cat is hard to find.

mrscoltweaver · Mar 30, 2007, 06:40 AM

Trust me, I weeded them out over the phone before I would even tell them where I live! I mean, its me and a toddler here home alone during the day... An aside, I agree about the warning sign on the boyfriend-buying a house points to a MAJOR commitment and he just may be showing signs of panic... best of luck!

Fr_Chuck · Mar 30, 2007, 06:57 AM

Well for course to some people one cat is one too many, but he wants 3 cats to go, start with his and the one his relation gave to you, or is he wanting to keep his, and make you give up 3 of yours ?

It sounds like it really is some other issue, unless as noted, the situation is bad, and you can not afford to properly keep that many cats.

Jessyfay · Mar 30, 2007, 10:40 AM

If the relationship is going to end because of cats than it's not a very strong relationship, this reminds me of an ad I saw once... I'll post it.
I think that if you can responcibly take care of the 7 cats and keep a clean, fur reduced home, there shouldn't be a problem. I would ask him why he thinks there is a problem and what you can do to resolve it. Maybe he thinks that the cats are taking up too much attention and he feels left out. But it sounds like you really don't want to lose any cats so I would make that clear and also make clear that if he is looking to see if who's more important in your life him or the cats, make sure he knows it's him. But if it really making you upset about losing the cats, I don't think that is fair for him to do. A loved one shouldn't make you feel that way. I would not get rid of the cats, but give your partner more attention and aknowledge that he is important to you and try to work things out.

Jessyfay · Mar 30, 2007, 10:40 AM

Here's the ad this reminds me of...