[rachelgirl4]

At the same time as my parent's divorce, and my many other situations there was something that happened to my mother which was just horrible. My mom was scammed and lost $13,000 the worst way. One of my mother's Christian's friends set my mom up with some guy who went to my mother's friend Church. My mom never met him (thankfully), she talked to him through Yahoo. He pretended he was a sweet guy in the UK, all elaborate lies. He lied and elaborately hurt my mother, through the course of six months. He clamied he was stuck in the UK, and needed money, etc. The bank (which was never a bank is what stung her at the end). He even talked to me and my brother, claiming he had gifts for us, he even told me through Yahoo as well he loved my mother and that he loved me and my brother, etc. I had doubts about this from the beginning, but I was so happy for my mother, he was so sneaky he didn't demand too much from my mother at all until he really did the sting. She said she saw signs but refused to see them. I'm so hurt by all of this.
I thought we might just have a family again. The sad thing is my effin *** of a father refusing to help making my mom make ends met, never paying child support, or even following the divorce decree, he's such a stubborn ***. This man (fraud) promised my mother that he would help her. My mom at the end helped my dad make his ends met, she got burned, she wanted to help this man get out of the UK, which she got burned, and she tried to help her father (my grand-father) and got burned. My dad set her up on this vulnerability. I hate my dad honestly so much.He found out what happened to my mother, he hasn't tried to help even once. In novemeber she's going to take him to court for spousal and child support.
She's a teacher, and all her bonus money, all her money she worked off for in the summer is all gone. My dad is still being an ***, my grandfather tried to help, but finacially it's going to take a long time for my mother to get her money back. I am so tired of all this. I'm so miserable it's not even funny. I hate the fact this fraud, and my dad hurt my mother, that's what kills me the most. I've moved on from this, but today it's starting to all hit me hard, and I'm about to lose my sanity.

[sewslikethewind]

First of all, I am so sorry for you and your family. Know that all people are not a-holes. Things were once good for you and for your Mother and they will be again. Your mother takes care of everyone but herself, she has got to do that. As for your father, I would tell him how damaging his actions towards your Mother are on YOU.

You would probably both benefit from some counseling to help you get things turned around as quickly as possible. Good luck.

[JudyKayTee]

Lonely/sad people get "stung" all the time. I'm amazed that no one saw the result coming.

At any rate your father is not obligated to pay until the Court orders him to do so. Why hasn't your mother filed for support? Should he pay voluntarily? Certainly. Can anyone but the Court force him to pay? No.

Maybe the fact that your mother had $13,000 to send to a stranger is part of the reason that your father won't contribute.

The arguments between your mother and father affect you, certainly, but it's not your battle.

If you are using this language when speaking about your father, if you think he should help your mother recover financially from her mistake I think you need to speak to a counsellor. Few people have that kind of money available to send to a stranger.