View Full Version : Texts me everyday, calls once a week, never asks me out for weekends...

Feb 10, 2011, 09:36 AM
I met a man on-line. He pursued me relentlessly via texts, e-mails, calls and asking me out. I told him I wanted to go slow. He said he usually moves fast when he meets someone he really likes. He told me that he wants to see where this is going to go because he thinks I'm too good to be true and he really likes me a lot. I let my guard down one night (two weeks ago) and we got a little hot and heavy. It seemed nice and we were making progress. He even projected about me meeting his friends, family, etc. and asked me to stay over (which I did not do).

Since then, he texts me, but he stopped e-mails and calls once in a while. He never wants to see me on the weekends ~ he always makes plans, but he'll see me during the week for a few hours after work. He'll always text "Good Morning" "How are you" and "Sweet Dreams". What gives?? I can't figure this guy out. I'm meeting him tonight (Thursday) because again he made plans for the weekend without me(friends are staying from Florida). I was so frustrated the other night that I went on line (dating site where I met him) and he was on-line.? I feel like I'm being played but there were absolutely no red flags when I met him. He's a grounded gentleman with a good job.

Any advice?

Feb 10, 2011, 09:53 AM
Perhaps your not the Saturday night date, maybe someone else is?

If he was online, maybe your not his only option and he's playing the field.

If you want a Saturday night date make one, maybe not with him.

Your not exclusive,your not in a relationship, no reason why you cant.

Just as an aside, be careful about making online dates, go somewhere public and tell someone where your going and with whom.

Feb 10, 2011, 10:07 AM
How long have you known him?

The first big red flag was that he wanted to go at his pace. He wants to make certain of where this is going so he has to rush it where he wants it to go. Classic player/cheater move. Fed you a bunch of platitudes about meeting his friends and family. Got a bit of his 'needs' met and now he all but disappears.

Sounds like he may be worse than just a player. Only meets you during the week. Weekends always have something going on. I wonder if his wife/girlfriend works out of town and is home on the weekends. I wonder if he has to go back home on weekends. He wouldn't be the first person to have multiple lives. It amazes me how they can use the same basic facts to build relationships with multiple people.

Now, I could be wrong. He could be all that he purports to be, but then he's still on the dating site.

I would err on the side of caution and let him go before things get deeper. Trust your instinct to go slower next time. Don't trust anyone who is in a rush to 'see where this is going'. It usually means they want to skip the getting to know you parts of the relationship to get to the physical aspects and then end it so he/she can find out how the next one will turn out.

Take care of yourself and good luck.

Feb 13, 2011, 09:54 AM
Men will tell you anything and do anything to get what they want.. you have to be careful and if they aren't willing to go your pace then you shouldn't be with that man.. If he really liked you or was interested in you he would be hanging out with you every weekend and should be inviting you to places with him. But men need their "guy time" (you know hanging out with the guys,etc.) and you should respect that but if he is spending it with another girl then he is a waste of you time.

Feb 13, 2011, 06:09 PM
He has more options, and opportunities than you do. What you thought that this was exclusive, or something? Did you ask? I wouldn't put any eggs in this stranger basket, but I would be exploring other options, and opportunities besides him.

Feb 13, 2011, 06:18 PM
Yes, did he ever say he was not going to date others, and why should he not ? You were plan that you were not serious yet and wanted to take it slow. Slow is often dating several people and finding out who you may want to get serious with.

Next of course he may have something else going on late at night or weekends ( perhaps a wife or live in girlfriend? )