Don´t worry, I didn´t kill anyone, and I know this is a bit morbid BUT...

I have drama at school, and I chose it, because all my friends went etc. but it is a really stupid subject, with a really stupid teacher.

Okay, and she like gave us this task:

"How do you get rid of a dead body without anyone noticing?"

She is doing some sort of play and I guess she ran out of ideas... Well, do you have ANY ideas, because I don´t.

Thanks.

One bite at a time.

There are plenty of real life examples. Cutting up is popular. Rolled up in a rug. Dumped at sea. Burying. Storing in a freezer. Incineration (smell).

There seems to always be a way to find the guilty party. One thing that they always mess up on is the cutting up method.

What I usually do is [edited to remove gruesome details].

Are you sure you don't have a body in your freezer waiting to be moved??

j/k :)

are you sure you don't have a body in your freezer waiting to be moved????

j/k :)

Absolutely positive :)

If you have showtime watch Dexter He knows how to get rid of a body.

If you have showtime watch Dexter He knows how to get rid of a body.

Yeah! Good idea!

I'm suspect of your teacher.. lol

Hello dave;

Isn't that what a wood chipper is for?

excon

Well since it is almost Christmas you could use the box from an artificial xmas tree to hide/transport the body.

Tell the neighbors you are taking the old tree to the thrift store and hope no one notices that the box seems to contain something heavier than a plastic tree.

The "cooking piles" are built on an asphalt pad, where the carcasses are placed atop a layer of wood chips. A layer of previously composted material is heaped on that, followed by another layer of wood chips. Workers add water and stir the material to accelerate the decomposition.

The wood chips and decomposing carcasses can heat up to more than 170 degrees, creating large piles of what looks and smells like black mulch--except for a few thigh bones and hooves, which also eventually disintegrate.

Acid is always a good option! Or maybe don't get rid of the body, set up the scene of the crime to look like an accident. I once read a book where a lady hit her husband over the head with a frozen leg of lamb, killing him, and put the leg of lamb in the oven. She then put the body at the bottom of a stair case and called the police. When they arrived, she showed them the body. While they were making out the report, the lamb finished cooking, so she feed it to the police officers. Perfect, the police ate the murder weapon.

Hello dave;

Isn't that what a wood chipper is for?

excon

You beat me to the woodchipper!! :D Was going to say that. Kind of popular in the deep south and backwoods areas. Kind of messy, too.

You take it to a pig farm at night, they eat everything including bone, that's why you never trust a man with a pig farm.

You could always pull a Poe and bury it under your floorboards...

You could always pull a Poe and bury it under your floorboards....

Yes, that might work, but then again, you may go insane

You don't ,you let him /her hang out in your place.
Its always where you least expect it in any kind of horror/drama

I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.

Make it into a garden bed

Chop it up

Melt it in a Bucket of acid

Burn it

Dump it in the woods

Report is as a suicide (succinycholine, which is used as a paralyzing agent in horses and humans used medically for surgery and a medical overdose is almost undetectable, with a noose tied around there neck would be an example)

And now I think I have too much time on my hands and have worked in the medical field too long

Hiding it in the closet

Hiding it in a graveyard

Throwing it in the dump

Throwing the body in the river

If I had to do it... I think that it would have to be a weighed down body miles out to see. Check the tide charts online and make sure it is not a popular diving area. It wouldn't be a bad idea to put chum between the clothes and body to speed up the "decomposition" process either. Just using my imagination!

EAT IT!

(JUST KIDDING)

Well, I was thinking you could burn it? Because I think is doing stuff like incineration and things like that is a lot more complex then burning it. After burning, throw the ashes in some rivers in China or Thailand or the shores of Chile or something. Lol.

Do it internationally, it's harder to figure out. Don't worry, I'm no killer that mastered this art. =)

Use a Blendtec Total Blender... you've seen the "Will It Blend" videos on YouTube. I think a dead body would definitely blend. Then just pour the liquid down into the sewer of a remote location.

I think you could sneak into a cremating factory and drug the workers in the room.. then go and drag the body in.. And put it on the tray, push the button and voilà it's cremated.. and then sneak out..

No one would ever think to look there for a dead body..

Haha this is fun to think about.. but don't worry I'm not a killer! :)

OOOOO I have another one!!

Put the body in a safe, and then lock it and put it in a sink hole!!

I read that in a book

I think you should tell your drama teacher it is a sick assignment

Your drama teacher isn't missing any friends or family or students are they?

Well, I have heard of where a man cut up his wife and then put her in a tube and then welded the ends shut. Then he put it in the concrete floor of his garage, and it went years unnoticed. But, that isn't really good, since he did get busted.

I just feel weird evening answering this question just in case you are a killer. I would feel terribly guilty giving you advice. Lol

i just feel weird evening answering this question just incase you are a killer. I would feel terribly guilty giving you advice. lol

Well, you know. He hasn't been back to this post since November. I guess the odds are good enough!

Nah he isn't

nah he isnt

Yea, I really didn't think so. Ya never know though, but I doubted it.

To be honest, incinerating a dead body is a lot of work that includes a lot of machinery. Burning a dead body isn't really too smart, either, as burning flesh smells god awful.

Woodchipper, cutting it up, etc. is the best bet, however, they tend to get messy.

I suggest to the teacher (if you DID murder someone, please, stop reading here, and report yourself to the authorities, as you are a bad person. BAD!) to find a workshop to do this work in. Your garage is not really good, as people will notice the decomp smell, not to mention, any sort of trace evidence will get noticed.

First, wrap your entire workshop with plastic sheets that construction workers use when they build homes. You can find entire rolls of these at home depot/Lowe's.

Then, using a concrete saw or a circular saw, dismember each limb, preferably in small portions. Place these in a heavy duty trash bag (I suggest double-bag) and put them in duffel bags. I don't suggest using cheap duffel bags.

Then, you can do what you wish with them. Throw them in the ocean, lake, bury them, etc. Remember to remove fingers/dental to avoid identification. You can burn the fingerprint with simple sulfuric acid you can buy at a local hardware store, and as far as dental, you can place them in a 2-L of coke and it should do a decent job of getting rid of any details. It won't fully disintegrate the teeth, so you would have to spread the teeth in different areas, as you need the entire set to do a dental match.

When completed, clean your entire workplace with ammonia/bleach, clean your car, preferably getting it detailed.

Get rid of your clothes that you were wearing when you did the "deed." Preferably, burn them in a dumpster in a less trafficked area.

Oh, and don't forget to take a shower thoroughly, and use gloves the entire time, and also a hairnet.

... of course, this is all... fiction.. . right? ::chuckles nervously::

Oh crud. Didn't even notice this person asked 2 months ago.. . man, ignore that post.

Somebodys been watching dexter lol

oh crud. didn't even notice this person asked 2 months ago. ...man, ignore that post.

Note to self:: Stay away from Sneezy! :eek::eek:

Several years ago I was a steelworker and there was a story that went around the mill about a couple of guys in the blast furnace. One of them was pissed at the other. One night they were making cast, when the molten iron started to flow one guy shot the other then dumped body and gun into the cast. Both were incinerated instantly.

While this is possible it is in no way practical. This is a story I found interesting for some morbid reason.

Now would be the perfect time to move a body by putting it inside an anolog television console. I have a floor model that was my grandmothers and I know it's big enough for a person to fit inside it. Your neighbors would think that you were just upgrading.

Wouldn't the trash people figure it out due to the smell, though?

Cruise ships seems like one of the current methods. Plus you get to see Exciting places

Hard to get the manifest changed, though...

How Not to Get Rid of a Body:
A couple of years ago, two neighbors in a rural area near here got into a dispute over a property line and one of them shot and killed the other one.

Coworkers reported the dead guy missing, so the sheriff's deputies went to his house and found the door wide open and the TV still on, liked he'd just walked out of the house for a minute. So they strolled over to the guilty neighbor's house in all innocence of the conflict or the death and asked if he knew anything. The neighbor seemed nervous and wasn't very helpful. He then announced he had to go check on a burn pile in his backyard and that he'd be right back.

After a minute or two, the deputies decided his behavior was suspicious and they followed him into his backyard. There they found him with a rake, trying to cover up the half burned corpse of his neighbor with a half burned sofa.

I read this in my local paper...

How Not to Get Rid of a Body:
A couple of years ago, two neighbors in a rural area near here got into a dispute over a property line and one of them shot and killed the other one.

Coworkers reported the dead guy missing, so the sheriff's deputies went to his house and found the door wide open and the tv still on, liked he'd just walked out of the house for a minute. So they strolled over to the guilty neighbor's house in all innocence of the conflict or the death and asked if he knew anything. The neighbor seemed nervous and wasn't very helpful. He then announced he had to go check on a burn pile in his backyard and that he'd be right back.

After a minute or two, the deputies decided his behavior was suspicious and they followed him into his backyard. There they found him with a rake, trying to cover up the half burned corpse of his neighbor with a half burned sofa.

I read this in my local paper...

Wow!

I mean, Wow!

You chew your own arm off and leave! :p

Easy. You have the choice to chopping it up into pieces and then burning it into ashes or just burning it into ashes as a whole. Afterwards wipe it all up, take the ashes and dump them in the middle of the ocean or wherever you favor in dumping things. That's what I did with my first body and continue to do. Its genius. Good luck.

Easy. You have the choice to chopping it up into pieces and then burning it into ashes or just burning it into ashes as a whole. Afterwards wipe it all up, take the ashes and dump them in the middle of the ocean or wherever you favor in dumping things. That's what I did with my first body and continue to do. Its genius. Good luck.

Throw a block party Bar-B-Que?

Taxadermy and prop them up in the window, Norman, Norman, come here Norman

Some criminals use biology to hide their victim... For example, you can use larvae, worms, etc. to eat and help the body decay naturally. But since the larvae (ect.) is eating the body, it won't leave a pile of decayed human flesh... As for the bones I guess it'd be soft by then and you can just burn it?

Some criminals use biology to hide their victim...For example, you can use larvae, worms, etc. to eat and help the body decay naturally. But since the larvae (ect.) is eating the body, it won't leave a pile of decayed human flesh...As for the bones I guess it'd be soft by then and you can just burn it?

Insects don't need any help finding a body. So this is just "leaving it around" hoping no one will find it. If it's out in the woods, animals are likely to eat it. (I have seen an entire deer carcass cleaned down to the bones in three nights.) After that, yes, the larvae will continue to work on any soft tissue left on the bones, in the skull, skin, etc. I don't think the bones get soft very fast. They can be buried for 6 months and come up in good shape.

I suppose you could try to do this inside somewhere. Ugh. No pile of decayed human flesh, but a HUGE pile of feces from the various beetle and fly larvae. And you've still got the bones, which will have a strong smell.

Burning it is a bad idea, as the stench of human flesh is unbearable, also, you'll need a ridiculously hot fire in order to fully burn the body. Throwing a body into a bonfire won't get rid of it fully, and then you're left with a heaping mess of charred human carcass.

The insect theory works, but only if you have a LOT of time, as it takes quite a bit of time for the course of nature to work upon the body... not to mention, the bones that are left behind. If you want absolutely no remains left, this is also a bad way to go about it.

Someone may think I am crazy but..

--First, burn it (It will wreck the majority of the DNA), then take out ALL of the teeth (No dental records to match), THEN, cut it up into little pieces and scatter them around. Make sure there is nothing really noticeable (Like a hand or a foot, shop them up smaller!)..

Anyway, I watch to many horror shows.

News Flash: A weekly science magazine reports that researchers at the National Institute of Standards and Technology have invented a device that can detect the odors released by a decomposing corpse even if it is buried underground or in small parts. They can drill a hole through a concrete slab or under rubble, then insert a tube that can "smell" rotting flesh. It cannot tell the difference between a human and another animal. (They tested it on buried rats.) Other ways of finding a corpse include dogs and ground penetrating radar.

Feed the body to aligators, OR wrap him up and send him to egypt. The you can put him in a coffin like a mummy. By the time he is discovered, your dead anyway.

Feed it to alligators, OR wrap it up and send it to Egypt. Make sure he gets put in a mummy cofffin. By the time someone finds him. You'll be dead. (:

What do you mean you'll be dead?

I believe nkay figures it will be thousands of years before they find it, and you won't likely live thousands of years.

Oh, OK that makes a lot of sense then.

Omg u totally killed some 1 didn't u?! �

Omg u totally killed some 1 dint u ????!!!!!! �

And that gibberish is exactly what in English?

Throw it on acid.

Put a pair of glasses on the body and set him on your couch.