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View Full Version : Out or In?


Changita
Apr 14, 2008, 11:03 PM
Hello,
I'm very confused. I have been against divorce my whole life, but I'm beginning to think a lot about doing it. My husband doesn't really hurt me or anything; although he used to emotionally hurt me. We have been together for 6 years, Since I was 16, married for two I have a two yr. old daughter, who I love dearly. But I realized something about 6 months ago, there has been an empty place in me, that I have tried to fill with taking care of people, and having a baby, and getting married. I kept pushing thinking something would fill this hole, and now I have figured out that it is not something I can fill with those things. Ive realized that it is a space between us that has never been filled, I was just living in a fairy tale world were you meet and fall in love and you get married. He said to me once after we were married that at one time earlier on in our relationship he wanted out, but he didn't leave only because he felt sorry for me. He didn't tell me this until we got married, no one should ever feel that way about someone they stay with, even if he says he don't feel that way anymore, should they? I just want to be happy, but he doesn't want me to go out with friends or get along with my family, and he doesn't want to do anything that I want to even though Ive been on his escapades for 6yrs. Now. I don't know what to do anymore, he says he can change for me, but if there is a void in me, something missing, or a void in our relationship that I have tried to fill for so long, then is there hope? Even if two people are easy to get along together, never fight anymore or anything, is it so wrong for me to want to be happy, just truly happy even if I hurt him? There is just something missing and I need to know how other people see this.

james_dean
Apr 14, 2008, 11:24 PM
You have to do what makes you happy. It seems you missed out on your younger years and rushed into settling down. If you didn't finish school then do so and follow your dreams now. Work on doing things together that make you happy and if you can't find happiness together move on with your lives. Divorce is tough but depression hurts everybody especially your children. I've been there.

N0help4u
Apr 15, 2008, 03:13 PM
Sometimes you can think a void is because you are not happy with the way something is and you can change it to what you think will make you happy only to find out you are still unhappy. It can also end up being devastating to your daughter so you really have to think of all the ramifications before you make such a drastic decision. The grass isn't always greener.