One of my closest guy friends has been acting a little differently and I'm not
Sure how I feel about him. All of a sudden I find myself wanting to talk to him
Whether it be online or in class all the time and I smile whenever I see him
Walk in the door because I know he's going to make me laugh throughout the class
And brighten my day. He is a flirt, but now its gotten a little more than just
"friendly flirting" you could say.
I've known him since 7th grade and we've been in at least one class together
Every year since freshman year of HS (were seniors now). He always makes fun of
Me and jokes around with me, some people may take that as flirting. Last year,
Even our teacher noticed and asked our other friend if we were going out! (we
Weren't and never have) he sits right behind me in class this year and will
Sometimes play with my hair. And a few days ago when he was absent, my teacher asked if I
Knew he where he was, when I said I didn't know (I did know,he was at a v-ball
Tournament, I just said the easiest answer) another friend who sits right next
To us joked "why not isn't he your boyfriend?" I'm starting to worry that
People think its me trying to get him and flirting with him but its not.
We both play volleyball and he wants me to go to every one of his games. I
Missed one home game last week and I had to make him brownies so he would
Forgive me and he now expects me at every home game to watch him play (I've only
Seen his girlfriend at one of his games and it was last year btw). We are always
Partners for projects. Last year, us and our other friend had to make a music
video for a project and we did it to "love story" by Taylor swift. I was
"Juliet" and he was "Romeo" in the video. Then this year, he left me a voice
Mail on my phone at 1am and he was singing the song! He had no idea what the
Lyrics were but he was saying "i am Romeo and you are Juliet" over and over and
"its a love story baby just say yes". When it came up a few days ago, at first
He claimed it was his friend singing but then when it was brought up again a
Couple days later, he didn't deny doing it and joked that it was "irrelevant to
what we were talking about" Him and his girlfriend have been going out for awhile, last
Year when they started dating we all thought he had had a girlfriend just so he could
Have a girlfriend but there still together and on face book there "engaged" and there's a
Bunch of pics of them together. Why would he do all this and act the way he is
If he has a girlfriend??

One more thing: he asked me to ask our another friend if she thought he was hot,
When I asked why he said " I like to know these things" and he jokes around
Saying hook me up with your little sister. Sooo confusing.
My friend thinks he likes me, she says the way he talks and acts with me and his
Girlfriend are completely different. I would never ever do anything to break up there
Relationship.

What do you think? Sorry this is so long but I'm just confused and not sure if
Its just innocent friend stuff or something more.

The only person who can tell you why he is acting the way he is ,is him-so asking him might give you some explanations.

If it bothers you,I think you should let him know.
Like you said,his got a girlfriend,so he is off limits.

Be careful. There's one around every corner! Ask him what's going on!

I guess the reason why he acts that way is because you let him. If you let him do the things he does to you. He might think that its OK and there's nothing wrong. Sounds like he does likes you, but he also likes his girlfriend, you should give him restrictions, and let him know that your only a friend not someone that he can flirt around. He is affecting your emotions and the more you let him do that, the more you will start liking him. And try not going to all his home games that's his girlfriends job not yours. Be a friend don't be that other women. You want him to respect you as a friend not someone that he can go and starts thinking if he can have friends with benefits with. Start making some ground rules and stop the flirting. I could be wrong think logical not emotion.

Leave him alone!

Sorry my dear, but your letting this romantic sounding fool set you up to be his next romance. That's what he cares about, how far his rap will get him, and unless you put this would be player in his place you will find that falling for his crap will get you hurt.

First: Thank you for everyone's advice but I just want to make clear that I am NOT encouraging anything by flirting back with him. If I am, its not nearly to the extent that he is and I usually am completely oblivious/unaware that I'm even doing it. I respect the fact he has a girlfriend, and I would never do anything to break them up or anything of that nature. I agree that I do let these things he doing happen, I don't know why, I've always been a people pleaser which is why I agreed to his request to go to his games (im not going to every single one) and that's why I made brownies for him ONE time when I did miss. It was brownies, or "no friendship". Im sure he was kidding, but you never know with him.
Lastly, He and his girlfriend are Mormon, I'm a christian. So I don't know if the whole "player" thing still stands or maybe that's why if he does like me, he hasn't tried to pursue anything.

Oh and today, when he gave me back the pen I let him use, he called me "babe" (here you go babe, thanks babe)




What "friend" does that?

what "friend" does that?

Look I call people sweetie all the time.. It doesn't mean I'm after them. How old are you and how old is this guy?

That's true, he's just NEVER said anything like that to me before. Were both 17, I'll be 18 next month. I know I sound like a 10 year old asking about this stuff.. embarassing. It's just really confusing I don't know what to do and I'm worried about how other people see us. I mean if TEACHERS are asking if were a couple, when all we've ever done is talk to each in class and work on projects isn't that kind of odd?

Thats true, he's just NEVER said anything like that to me before. Were both 17, i'll be 18 next month. I know I sound like a 10 year old asking about this stuff..embarassing. it's just really confusing idk what to do and im worried about how other people see us. I mean if TEACHERS are asking if were a couple, when all we've ever done is talk to each in class and work on projects isnt that kind of odd?.

No you're fine. You asked for help and we're trying I would ask him how

He feels about you and ask him to be honest. Oh to be seventeen again. Be careful now. Don't let him use you and I think that may be his intention.

Threads merged


One of my closest guy friends has been acting differently around me and I think I'm starting to have feelings for him. He has a girlfriend, but the way he acts around me makes me wonder whether he has a girlfriend just to have one, or if loves her but has strong feelings for me also. I would never to anything to threaten there relationship, they've been going out for awhile and I respect that.
Here are some examples:

1. We've had a class together since freshman year (were both seniors) and always sit by each other and do projects together.
2. He sits behind me this year, sometimes he'll play with my hair or write his name on my shoulder. He jokes around with me a lot and teases me, we make each other laugh
3. He waits for me after class so we can walk out together, he tries to make it not noticiable but sometimes it pretty obvious.
4. Last year, our teacher asked our other friend if we were going out ( he had his girlfriend at that time too) and I think our teacher this year thinks were dating too, sometimes he'll look at us talking and just smile and when he was absent, our teacher asked ME if I knew where he was. I said I don't know ( I really did know I just said the easiest answer) then our friend jokingly said why not, isn't he your boyfriend?
5. We did a group project last year, and we had to make a music video. We did ours to love story by taylor swift. I was juliet and he was romeo. This year, I get a voicemail from him at 1AM singing I am romeo and you are juliet over and over and it's a love story baby just say yes. He's mormon, so it wasn't a drunk call. When I brought it up, he would joke around or change the subject.
6.We both play volleyball and he wants me to go to all his home games to watch him play. I missed 2 and both times, he said he was so upset with and kept looking for me in the stands. He says it in a joking way, but apart of me feels like he may be serious.
7.We talk all the time in class, and online too about anything at all.
8. He called me babe a few times the other day, he's never said anything or called me anything like that before

He's always been a flirt, and I try not to encourage anything but it has never been to this extent. What does this mean?! Is there something deeper going on or is it not the big a deal?

He has a girlfriend

Big red flag.

Think of it this way, if he behaves this way with his current girlfriend, what makes you think he will be any different if you became his girlfriend?

Not exactly relationship material to me!

I doubt seriously if you will get different responses by starting another post about the same thing. But I do have a question. Why do you allow a guy with a girlfriend to get you all hot and bothered?

As another poster stated, what makes you think that when he gets tired of you, player guy won't have another girl to take your place really fast? He is a player, and he goes from one female to another so fast, you can't keep up.

That's right he is a player, his religion has nothing to do with it, so what's the deal with you blindly falling for a guy who takes no prisoners, but gets his jollies keeping the ladies shuffling at his command.

Tell me what's up with that?

You are asking for a whole bunch of trouble. He's playing you like a violin. Leave him alone.

He broke up with his girlfriend. Should I leave things the way they are or do something?

he broke up with his gf. should i leave things the way they are or do something?

Wait and be careful.

If he was talking to you behind her back, what the freak makes you think he won't do the same to you? Tell me please, why you can't acknowledge that fact?

If he was talking to you behind her back, what the freak makes you think he won't do the same to you? Tell me please, why you can't acknowledge that fact?





Wait and see if he tries to charm another girl like he has you! He's a charmer and a player. Leave him alone!

You know for a fact that he was talking to you whilst he was still with his ex.

So he is a player.

Players should be avoided.

Avoid him.

OK I aprreciate everyone's advice but since when is talking considered cheating? We've been close friends for 4 years long before him and his girlfriend started going out so I'm not going to avoid my friend. Oh and Because he has/had a girlfriend means that we can't be friends and still talk? He has been acting this way around me for the past month or so,changed not all the years we've been friends so something has obviously changed. We also have most of the same friends so I know he doesn't flirt to this extent with every single girl.

ok i aprreciate everyones advice but since when is talking considered cheating? we've been close friends for 4 years long before him and his gf started going out so im not going to avoid my friend. Oh and Because he has/had a gf means that we can't be friends and still talk? He has been acting this way around me for the past month or so,changed not all the years we've been friends so something has obviously changed. We also have most of the same friends soo i know he doesnt flirt to this extent with every single girl.

Good luck!

Good luck!

It could lead to that!

If he just broke up, that makes you a rebound in my book. Stay friends, and that's it.

If he just broke up, that makes you a rebound in my book. Stay friends, and thats it.

Focus on your school academics. Who wants to end up with a loser. He's after one thing. Don't end up getting in trouble with this guy. If he'd cheat on one he'll cheat on another. Athink about College and your future. I'm hoping you take this advise.:)

He may just be the kind of guy that has to have someone, because he doesn't like to be alone.

There are many, both men, and women who feel that way.

He may just be the kind of guy that has to have someone, because he doesn't like to be alone.

There are many, both men, and women who feel that way.

As I said before, concentrate on your school work, go to college and don't get into trouble with this guy. He is only one of many you will meet on your journey in life. Some will be good guys who truly want a friendship before you get too involved. Others will be players who want a one night stand in the backseat of a car. Wise up young lady...

My close guy friend who I've started to have feelings for called me the other day (were on spring break so we haven't seen each other in a few days) asking me if a test we had taken in a class we have together was scantron or not. The test was last week, he sits right behind me in that class and knows we never pay attention or do anything in that class, and now he expects me to remember something like that? He's called me once before a couple of months ago at 1am singing love story to me (inside joke) and no he was not drunk.

Our relationship is pretty complicated, we get along super well and apparently we flirt a lot because people and even teachers have asked if we were dating. He just broke up with his girlfriend recentlly, and I don't know what will happen. But basically, do you think he was calling for the test or because he wanted to talk to me? My friends think he just wanted to talk to me and used that as an excuse.
Help?

Clear the confusion up with an honest conversation.

Just ask him, and end the speculation, and get facts.

Thats true, he's just NEVER said anything like that to me before. Were both 17, i'll be 18 next month. I know I sound like a 10 year old asking about this stuff..embarassing. it's just really confusing idk what to do and im worried about how other people see us. I mean if TEACHERS are asking if were a couple, when all we've ever done is talk to each in class and work on projects isnt that kind of odd?

Just be aware he has a girlfriend and don't read too much into it.:)

Threads merged



Had recently started to have some feelings for my close guy friend and I feel that he may feel the same way for me. It is very hard to say, and very confusing, but there have been moments where I've wondered if he does like me as more than a friend. Recently, I had a dream we were at school, he was in his volleyball sweats and we were sitting on a luch table talking. He wrapped his arms around me in a very "couplely" manner and he was calling me babe like he has started doing now and then the past few days. He mentioned something about how we kissed before which we never have. We had to "fake kiss" for a video project last year but that's it. He then told me to close my eyes and he kissed me. It was short and sweet, just a long peck you could say not some big makeout session, but in that kiss I remember feeling tingles all down my back and lips, I guess you could call it a "spark". After the kiss, I remember telling my close friends what just happened and how I've never felt that with anyone else I have kissed. It was the first thing I though about when I woke up this morning and I can't stop thinking about how real that kiss felt. I've never had a dream like thins about anyone before. What do you think this means? Idk if I should make a move or not..

Well it means you like him. But is it for the right reasons? I would try to get to know him a little better. And I wouldn't hop in and tell him how you feel. Just get to know him like when your with him just start a conversation and you could ask him questions. But don't make it sound like your trying to interview him. Make it sound fun and normal. And see if he's showing signs that he likes you then you could probably tell him how you feel.
Goodluck.

Well it means you like him. But is it for the right reasons? I would try to get to know him a little better. And I wouldn't hop in and tell him how you feel. Just get to know him like when your with him just start a conversation and you could ask him questions. But dont make it sound like your trying to interview him. Make it sound fun and normal. And see if he's showing signs that he likes you then you could probaly tell him how you feel.
Goodluck.

Dreams are just that sweetie... Dreams... Good luck!! :)

With this dream, you have manifested a scenereo with the boy you are attracted to. It has come from confusion, attraction, hesitation, perhaps mixed messages, and likely a bit of tepidation.

Dreaming is a safe place to put all of those things into a picture, or impression, in order to make sense of them.

If I had had that dream, I would consider it a sign that I have very strong feelings for this guy, and would likely make a move. Not rent a hotel room or anything like that, but ask him over to your house to watch movies, or chat on Facebook sort of thing.

Him not making a move may be his own insecurity, and you taking a few small steps might break the ice.

I don't know too many people who haven't felt an 'attraction' to another person, and that attraction may be non-verbal and not at all physical. It is a feeling that leads us to exploration to see if the spark is mutual.

I would wait a few days until the dream hangover goes away. When you aren't thinking about the dream continuously, and it isn't any longer in every thought, then think about approaching him with something simple.

I've started to have feelings for one of my close guy friends and I have no idea how he feels about me, it changes all the time and its so confusing. There's days where I'm like yes he likes me, and days where I'm like of course he doesn't what was I thinking? Here's why:
We've been friends all throughout high school (were seniors now)he had a girlfriend for about a year and a half from a different school and they broke up a couple months ago. Even when he was with his girlfriend he would flirt like CRAZY. He sits behind me this year, and sometimes he'll play with my hair or write his name on my shoulder, call me babe etc. He jokes around with me a lot and teases me, we make each other laugh and We talk all the time in class, and online too about anything at all. We've been mistaken as a couple a few times (once by a teacher!). We both play volleyball, and at first he wanted me to go to every home game and some away games, when I missed a couple, he acted all hurt saying he was looking for me in the stands. Then he also asked some other girls I'm friends with to go too, to start a cheering section. I've called him to hang out twice, but it fell through. When we talk online, I usually start the conversation.
Over spring break when we hadn't seen each other in a few days, he called asking me if a test we had taken in a class we have together was scantron or not. The test was the week before, he sits right behind me in that class and knows we never pay attention or do anything in that class, and now he expects me to remember something like that? My friends think he just wanted a reason to talk to me but I'm not sure.
Im good at art, and he asked me to draw a portrait of him and I did. It's now hanging by his bed.
Im just so confused about how he feels and I can't just ask him how he feels because our relationship is so jokey and I don't want to ruin anything. What should I do? How do you think he feels about me?

I don't know.
He could be just flirting.
Why don't you ask him out for a hamburger or something and as you guys talk, maybe you'll get a better idea.

Will first of all, he just broke up with his ex relationship of 1 year. He can use you like a rebound it's a possibility, he might feel alone and needs someone to show affection and you're the perfect candidate.
We will never know unless you till him how you feel, but remember everything we do there is a consequence. He might feel awkward and starts acting all weird around you, or he might turn up being a jerk, him knowing that your into him, he might just give you some mix signals and hoping he can use you as friends of benefits so he can full fill his sexual needs.
Just be prepared for everything the best or worst, he might like you but we will never know unless you go and let him know. Wish you for the best.

Why don't you just talk to the guy instead of copy and pasting the same thing on here for two months??

I think you are looking for one of us to tell you this guy is secretly in love with you and you should just cast caution to the wind and go for it. I don't think that will happen.

He has been flirting with you for years why, because you let him, it made him feel special. Now he doesn't have a girl friend so maybe he thinks he'll maybe he'll just she ho far he can go with you. You don't need to be a rebound!

But if you really want to know what the deal is, ask him.

Thats true, he's just NEVER said anything like that to me before. Were both 17, i'll be 18 next month. I know I sound like a 10 year old asking about this stuff..embarassing. it's just really confusing idk what to do and im worried about how other people see us. I mean if TEACHERS are asking if were a couple, when all we've ever done is talk to each in class and work on projects isnt that kind of odd?

Not really... maybe you're reading too much into this. I wish you luck.

I can see how this can be very confusing for you. First off it is possible that flirting is just his personality. I personally flirt with everyone I know friends, significant others, guy, girl, siblings, parents, pets, and sometimes even inanimate objects. It might not mean that he likes you like that. You might need to pay attention to how he acts around other people as well. Now if it is just you that he acts like this around then its possible that he feels very comfortable with you. I would say ask him strait up, but if he is anything like me he will probably make a joke out of it. He might not know his own feelings yet and like both you and his girlfriend, in which case he needs to figure out what he wants. It is also possible that he does like you, but is afraid to lose you as a friend. If you like him back then id suggest you either casually bring up, elude to it, or throw it in as a joke and watch his reaction.

I hope this helps.

I can see how this can be very confusing for you. First off it is possible that flirting is just his personality. I personally flirt with everyone i know friends, significant others, guy, girl, siblings, parents, pets, and sometimes even inanimate objects. It might not mean that he likes you like that. You might need to pay attention to how he acts around other people as well. Now if it is just you that he acts like this around then its possible that he feels very comfortable with you. I would say ask him strait up, but if he is anything like me he will probably make a joke out of it. He might not know his own feelings yet and like both you and his gf, in which case he needs to figure out what he wants. It is also possible that he does like you, but is afraid to lose you as a friend. If you like him back then id suggest you either casually bring up, elude to it, or throw it in as a joke and watch his reaction.

I hope this helps.











Leave the guy alone... he has already made it clear how he feels. Don't pursue someone who has made you feel like he has made you feel. He and your friend deserve each other and you need to move on. Good Luck

Leave the guy alone...he has already made it clear how he feels. Don't pursue someone who has made you feel like he has made you feel. He and your friend deserve each other and you need to move on. Good Luck

Kit, there a reason you quoted me ?


kit, there a reason you quoted me ?

Nm disregard, I didn't see the other 5 pages... my post was a response to the original question without the updates

nm disregard, i didn't see the other 5 pages ... my post was a response to the original question without the updates

You are learning. It takes time but you're doing fine:)

Thanks everyone for the help, sorry I don't know why it keeps reposting all my questions into this thread its annoying me as much as its annoying you so I'm just going to stop I'm over it

Because all of your threads are about the same person, they are pertinent.
You keep asking different questions hoping to get different answers. It's not going to happen.
Leave the guy alone. He's playing you

Keep on posting.. that's why we're here.

The end of my freshman year of High school and beginning of summer, I was dating this wonderful guy vinny who was a junior. However, he happened to be the older brother of a good friend of mine (sam) who was on my volleyball team. When we first started dating, she said she didn't care. We went on 2 dates, and after that she asked me to end it because it was uncomfortable for her. (she has called him once to have him pick her up and he couldn't because he was taking me out.. that was what changed for her) her friendship means a lot to me and since our families are also close I decided to end things between me and him. In the end, I feel it was the better decision, we are all still friends and stay in touch throughout the years. However, this past weekend I went to sam's graduation party (we both just graduated H.S.) and he was there of course. He hugged me and we talked throughout the party, he sat next to me at dinner, and all those feelings came back but this time even stronger for me. I'm starting to think that maybe I am meant to be with this guy and it was just bad timing the first time. I don't know if he would ask me out again since I ended things before or if he'd even want to, but I don't know how to let him know that I am more than willing to go out with him again in case he does. He's super close with sam and his other sister and I'm afraid that if I do send him something online or text that he would show them and everything would go out of control. I don't know if I'll see him again this summer long enough to bring it up. What do you think I should do?

I think you should go with your gut instinct.

Its not fair to you either that your friend is prohibiting you from seeing this guy. She needs to grow up and let go.

Maybe things will be different now. If you want to go for it, then go for it. Its better to have at least tried instead of living with regret.

I'll doubt he'll show his friends or your friends everything you text to him. That'd be pretty immature if he did.

Give it a try! Text him.. texting goes straight to his personal cell phone. Writing things on the Inet is a little bit more broadcasty...

Good luck you

Your life is yours for you to live it, with whoever you want, no one has the right to dictate who you do or don't spend your time with.

I would be most annoyed if a friend of mine tried to tell me who I could or couldn't associate with, and I would rethink my friendship with her.

My friends wouldn't do this though because they are my friends, and friends just don't impose themselves on each other like that they accept us for who and what we are and they respect our choices too.

Yes send him a text she won't have to see it, its none of her business anyway, she doesn't own you...

Do what feels right for you At ALL times...

Do you think your friend will ask you to stop seeing him again?? Has she gotten over her discomfort?

I would surely ask her, IF this guy pursues you. Until you know for sure say nothing to her.


I don't know if I'll see him again this summer long enough to bring it up. What do you think I should do?

Maybe this is beyond you if you don't expect him to be around. Best to wait, and find out. I was going to say be bold and see, but that may be a bit forward, and premature. But you said you have stayed in contact with him though.. (See if he will go out with you, and worry about the friends reaction later. I hope you and your friend have grown up a bit since last time, or it's the same crap all over again.)