My boyfriend and I have been together for quite some time... We have a great relationship,and enjoy sex to a great extent. For a few weeks we have playfully joked about having a threesome with another girl (yet to be decided who) and honestly I am kind of into the idea, but I don't want to do it if it is going to have any consequences on our relationship. We have discussed rules, what we want, and so on... can sex just be sex? Please discuss personal experiences!

I had a threesome with my best friend and my boyfriend at the time... it was the biggest mistake. My boyfriend fell in love with my best friend. If you are in a commiteed relationship I would not bring another person into your bedroom. My husband has fantasyies of me with another woman and so we talk about it during love making, that is almost as good. In the end it is your decision.

I Have had a three some with My Boyfriend (Ex now) and With a Friend. Short after that, he wanted to leave me.. And he did.. He Cheated. If u do have a three some make sure its when u are single, and everyone that u have one with is single. The men are normally going to get ideas.. Its sad to say.. This is what Ive gone through.. It was fun at the time, just not when I figured out that right after We did have a threesome, he wanted other women!

Hello Tressy

Adding anyone or adding extream kinky games can back fire on you. I know you say there will be rules but what if (and this happens all the time) when one person wants to get more, deeper into the games and the other says no lets stop. Even if they stop the one that wanted to keep going now feels cheated and that always ends up breaking down the relationship.

Keep the fantisy alive by playing the other Lady. Have fun with wigs and dressing different. Let him pick you up and try to get what he wants. You can be the easy Lay or the nice girl that pushes him away for trying.

Hope this Helps
Dennis777

Adding another person is cheating, because it cheats on your relationship and cheapens your feelings.

Don't do it with someone you want to have a lasting relationship with.

Coming from a guy, your respect goes down the drain the minute you agree to it. He'll treat you with disrespect and eventually break it off.

If you do it find someone you do not know or run into at times. Personally I've done this in the past with two women who were into each other, Two different sets of women, it was their choice, I was happy to comply. Haven't done it with the wife. Its been discussed, but she hasn't come up with the nerve to do it. I'm not pushing her either. We worked out the rules and decided we would both have to agree on the woman and it would have to be someone we won't run into or know in private life.

You can do it and be respected. But you have to handle it in just the right way. Without jealousy. That will cause many problems. Treat it as something you both wanted to try... and then later treat it as something that's in the past. Sex can be just sex if you don't know the person. But you have to not be the type that can't let things go after they are over with.

My boyfriend and I have been together now for over 5 years and we have had three-somes on a few occasions. It has never effected our relationship or tainted it in any way. He never compares me to other women, nor does he try and force anyone into our sex life. The threesomes we have had have never been with strangers though from what I hear it can be a better idea then close friends because some friendships can go rotten or other things can happen. Though this has never happened to me. In order to do something like a threesome I feel that you need to be very close with each other and respect each other. If you do decide to go through with it. Make sure he knows how you feel. An example of this would be... when him and I are having a threesome with some wonderful woman (which it could be any woman or man depending on the couple) he will not come inside of her. He knows it bothers me and won't do it.. and he doesn't like other men inside of me so we have agreed that it would never happen even if somehow he ever got over his homophobic tendencies . (I'm not really into the mfm to begin with) I hope what I have said helps. If you have any other questions you would like to ask me feel free to send me a message. I hope I helped

Personαlly I sαy no binx44 mαy be lucky now but who knows αbout the lαter future αnd fr_chuck is right αbout the fαct thαt it is cheαting-- umm he's putting his _______ in αnother girl's ______ then in yours? cαn you sαy VD--- well it's α personαl choice..

I would sαy no you've put 5 yeαrs into the relαtionship why risk it?

No offence giving or taken... but first off. Not every man is a cheater. And when you say the later future... it seems like you think its actually going to affect or ruin our lives.. but its not. Some people are different. I know every man is not the same but sometimes you do come across the ones who you mean the world to. We've broken up before but it was never because of the sex we were having. We engage in threesomes a: because to him he gets the best of bolth worlds *lol* and b: I'm extremely bi-sexual and he knows I enjoy it. And the whole putting his ________ in her's and then yours... its very easy to use condoms and its just as easy to switch to a new one in a few seconds. Some couples have a rule about penetration... a threesome doesn't always have to involve him entering bolth women. I know a girl who's been married for 10 years and when her and her hubby engage in threesomes he only watches and touches he doesn't enter the other woman because he respects what his wife's opinion on it. No one should feel obligated or forced to do this for their significant other. If at all you ever feel uncomfortable about it be sure he knows and understands and that it stops there.

And about the whole cheating thing. How can it be considered cheating if you both are willing. But that is just my opinion. In the long run tressy. Its your decision and you should think long and hard on it. I've never met anyone that a threesome has ruined their relationship but I know it is possible when it comes to some people. Most likely the majority of them had other relationship problems... threesomes and other things like that should never be done to try and hold a relationship together... it just won't work. But at the same time.. with some couples the experience can change everything. Make sure your hubby knows that (if it does happen) there's no guarantee that it will happen again.

Why mess up a perfectly good fantasy, with reality??

In my opinion we didn't mess up a good fantasy. We just spiced up our sex lives by bringing some of that fantasy to life.. we have always been the type of couple to experiment (safely that is) with ideas. Its something that some couples either do or do not. We're both comfortable with ourselves and each other and felt that we wanted to try more daring and open things. Everyone we know knows that we have threesomes and they know we have a very open relationship. We don't hide what we do or say. And if someone's uncomfortable with it we just don't talk about things around them... as my mother always said "to Each his own..." and back to the person who started this topic.
Don't rush into things, take it slow and you won't regret it. That way if you change your minds you don't feel like you were just leading your partner on. Be sure to talk about Everything...