[MelvinJG]

I'm 19 and my girlfriend is 21. I'm African American have a high sexual drive and if it was up to me I'd have sex all day everyday(if it worked like that).My girlfriend who is Salvadorian on the other hand sexual drive isn't that high she does it because, she wants to please me. We have sex often about 5 to 6 times a week and I mainly feel that I only want it. Its kind of hard not to because I'm so attracted to her that I can't help but get a boner when she kisses me or touches me. I want to stop but I'm afraid she might think I'm cheating on her or that I'm not attracted to her anymore. Just 5 minutes ago she tried to go down on me and even though I wanted it, I told her no. She got some what of an attitude and now is laying at the foot of the bed,while I lay at the top typing this. I'm afraid of telling her that I don't want to have sex, because then she's going to ask a lot of questions and get defensive. I've tried taking her to public places to avoid as much sexual contact. But she tells me she rather sit in the house and hold me all day, which I don't mind,but it just leads to too much sex, and that's what I'm afraid of. I just don't want to have so much sex NOW, and then later down the road she gets tired of it and won't have sex at ALL.

[DoulaLC]

Why are you assuming that she will get tired of it? From what you have written, it appears that she is just as eager as you are, or at least pretty close. You are trying to put a limit on the intimacy that you share with each other because of something she "might" feel at some point?

Your race or ethnic background don't have anything to do with it. People are individuals and they will have individual desires and needs.

Has she actually said that she isn't really interested but only does it to please you? Maybe that is part of the enjoyment of it for her as well.

Talk to her about it. Ask her. Share your concerns and see what she has to say on the matter. Don't make the decision for her, she gets to do that for herself.

Last thing... be very careful with using birth control. It would be wise for both of you to use a form, condoms and pills for example, to lessen the chances of an unplanned pregnancy.

[FirstChair]

Something is missing here…You want sex more than her. She doesn't want sex as much as you. You want to stop having sex. She wants to please you. You refuse her advances. She turns you on. You are worried she will be suspicious of you cheating. You're worried about her not wanting sex with you later. You try to avoid sex and on and on… So what I get is that you did cheat and maybe caught something and want to avoid sex with her until you are cured. See a doctor if you haven't already and tell her the truth, whatever that may be.