[OneDude79]

And if she moans when you massage her but not during sex, maybe your technique needs tweaking? At the library, the sex books are at 612.6 :). (I was a librarian for 30 years.)

I don't think she would respond well to this, but I have never directly asked "how about we try XXXX", since her overall attitude suggests she would object.

[Wondergirl]

I'm not saying "Suggest to her so-and-so." I'm wondering how she's accepting what you do (thus the counseling with both of you in the room). I've been kissed by a few guys, and kissing technique varies from soup to nuts. I never wanted to kiss some of them ever again Others I would have kissed 24/7.

[JudyKayTee]

What is that supposed to mean?

It means that you're an adult with a lot of questions about how to handle your sex life with your wife - looking quickly it looks like 27 times in less than 12 hours. Don't you work?

Very often people post because they get a thrill out of it.

[Wondergirl]

A counseling session is 50 minutes once or twice a week.

[OneDude79]

It means that you're an adult with a lot of questions about how to handle your sex life with your wife - looking quickly it looks like 27 times in less than 12 hours. Don't you work?

Very often people post because they get a thrill out of it.

Yes, I work. I also have a lot of time on hold on the phone at work when I post.

[OneDude79]

I'm not saying "Suggest to her so-and-so." I'm wondering how she's accepting what you do (thus the counseling with both of you in the room). I've been kissed by a few guys, and kissing technique varies from soup to nuts. I never wanted to kiss some of them ever again Others I would have kissed 24/7.

Ok... but I'm not sure how many ways one can vary their technique in one sexual position. I am still not sure what you mean by her "accepting what I do" unless you mean I could be better at missionary or at kissing her, etc. She isn't a particularly great kisser, either, and I *have* tried varying that. She doesn't seem to get into it and backs off after 10-20 seconds most times. Always has. She says I kiss fine and my breath is fine, etc. She never says anything is "good" or "great" just "fine".

[Wondergirl]

Foreplay? Afterwards?

[OneDude79]

Foreplay? Afterwards?

Possibly. Foreplay is basically me doing things to her... massages, kissing, etc. Lately she doesn't seem interested in much else.

After usually consists lately of getting the crying baby out of his crib. His timing [ed.] has been impeccable, haha.

Perhaps it's the pressure of knowing I expect sex. Although I give her plenty of romance and sensuality without expecting or asking for sex.
The two week thing might work.

[OneDude79]

Damn autocorrect on my Android changed "timing" to "uninterested" in my last post for some reason.

[Wondergirl]

Possibly. Foreplay is basically me doing things to her...massages, kissing, etc. Lately she doesn't seem interested in much else.

Foreplay takes place beginning at least 8 hours before sex and involves you playing with her mind.

Do what you do, but don't end up having sex.

[OneDude79]

Foreplay takes place beginning at least 8 hours before sex and involves you playing with her mind.

Do what you do, but don't end up having sex.

I admit I don't know much about all day foreplay, it seems to basically fall into either sexting or things like coming up behind her, giving a hug and quick massage, then moving on and doing something similar later.

Sexting? She would either think I am nuts, or be annoyed. Maybe... and air stress MAYBE, mild non explicitly innocent texting may work, and no sex afterward, but I don't know.

We did mild stuff that when we first met in 2007.

I do make sure to do the other stuff, like come up and gently rub her neck at various times of the day, do some housework, etc. but its all routine.

[Wondergirl]

You need to read up on how a woman's mind works. Sexting isn't one of the ways. Library. 612.6.

[OneDude79]

You need to read up on how a woman's mind works. Sexting isn't one of the ways. Library. 612.6.

Well that was what the first few Google searches for "all day foreplay" turned up.

I'll try your suggestion.

[Wondergirl]

You do have a library card?

[OneDude79]

You do have a library card?

Yes I do. I am already thinking about where to hide the book. :)

[OneDude79]

Yes I do. I am already thinking about where to hide the book. :)

Or books.

[Wondergirl]

Why hide them?

[OneDude79]

Why hide them?

How will I explain why I have them if I am trying NOT to bring up sex for two weeks?

[Wondergirl]

Reading a book isn't bringing up sex. In fact, you may want to read parts of it to her or ask her if such and such is really true.

Start with this one --

Title: Why men want sex and women need love : unraveling the simple truth /
Author(s): Pease, Barbara. Pease, Allan.
Publication: New York, NY : Broadway Books,
Year: 2009
Description: xi, 265 p. : ill. ; 21 cm.
Language: English

Contents: Sex on the brain -- Straight talk on sex and love -- What women really want -- What men really want -- Wanted: meaningful overnight relationship - casual sex -- Your place or mine? Affairs and cheating -- How to find the right partner(s) - the mating rating quiz -- Fifteen mysteries about men that women don't understand -- Twelve truths about women most men don't know -- Thirteen tactics that can improve your mating rating -- A happier future together?

Standard No: ISBN: 9780307591593; 030759159X LCCN: 2009-48565

Abstract: Will men and women ever see eye-to-eye about love and sex? How will relationships ever be rewarding if men only want to rush into bed and women want to rush to the altar? In this practical, witty and down-to-earth guide, couples experts Allan and Barbara Pease reveal the truth about how men and women can really get along. By translating science and cutting edge research into a powerful yet highly entertaining read, you'll learn how to find true happiness and compatibility with the opposite sex.

SUBJECT(S)
Descriptor: Sexual attraction. Interpersonal relations.
Note(s): Includes bibliographical references (p. [259]-265).
Class Descriptors: LC: BF692; Dewey: 302
Responsibility: Barbara & Allan Pease.
Vendor Info: YBP Library Services Brodart (YANK BROD) $14.99
Document Type: Book
Entry: 20091120
Update: 20120301
Accession No: OCLC: 419797074
Database: WorldCat

[Wondergirl]

If your library doesn't own it, print out that WorldCat citation and be sure to mention the OCLC number at the bottom. Ask for an interlibrary loan.