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berkshiregirl · Apr 17, 2008, 04:16 PM

I have been sexually active with my partner for over a year now. He is not selfish at all during sex, and is always happy to pleasure me. However I never seem to orgasm. It always feels really good but never comes to anything. I feel as if there's like a pressure building up but then I get to a point that I can't take it anymore and find myself pushing him away. It feels good but just to strong. How can I get passed this?

plonak · Apr 17, 2008, 04:21 PM

I have a suggestion, but I'm trying to think of a way to not sound so graphic but.. I can't sooo bare with me..

The first couple times I had sex I orgasimed like within 2 minutes or so, I think it's because I deprived my body of it for 22 years and it was just so amazing.. but after a while I couldn't orgasm just straight from sex... here's what works for me and is AMAZING!

In missionary position have him pull back a little more vertical and resting on his knees, then while he's thrusting rub your clitoris , keep doing that and guaranteed you will come

KateBell88 · Apr 17, 2008, 05:08 PM

Originally Posted by plonak

in missionary position have him pull back a little more vertical and resting on his knees, then while he's going thrusting rub you , keep doing that and guaranteed you will come

You can also do that with spooning or on top or a load of other positions - personally I find missionary boring. If it gets to intense again, ask him to keep going but move his hand away for a minute or two.

Choux · Apr 17, 2008, 07:01 PM

I agree with you... I don't see how a woman can take all that heavy-handed, direct contact to her clitoris. I thought it was painful.

Good news! Orgasms start in your mind.

As an example, I had a colleague when I was a social worker who was a housing consultant for poor people and a former Baptist minister. We made a visit to a building that was sub par, and then went out for coffee at a McDonald's type place, he parking away from the building. It was there he began telling me sexy stories... then having explicit sex conversation... he brought me to climax just from conversation in a parking lot. :)

Lots is in the quality and experience of your lover... if he has few skills and is heavily influenced by porn, all his ministrations could be harmful to you. Why don't you look for an experienced man to have on the side, a good teacher, a man to bring you out?

simoneaugie · Apr 17, 2008, 10:10 PM

Too strong, pushing him away.

You have to want him in there. You need to wait, he needs to wait to stick it in until you are more than ready to have him there. Sex works for many women by not doing in, in, in, in, which works well for men.

As Choux put it quite clearly, insertion of the penis is not necessary. To most men, that insertion is what constitutes sex. A woman is more than a vagina, far more. A vagina is a place of potential, not a destination.

He must move at your speed, not you at his. It is an art to make most women orgasm. True, it isn't all his fault. Tell him what feels good. Ask him to continue it longer. When it gets too strong, ask him to stop for a few minutes. Then continue, slowly, like you have all the time in the world.

talaniman · Apr 18, 2008, 12:14 AM

It feels good but just to strong. How can I get passed this?

Go with it a few times, sounds if your jumping off the roller coaster before the thrill of the ride. We aren't talking hurting are we? If not maybe tell yor partner not to let go so fast.

berkshiregirl · Apr 20, 2008, 05:56 AM

Thanks for your help.il c what happens!

codytheman · Apr 20, 2008, 01:37 PM

No