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    XsweetheartsX's Avatar
    XsweetheartsX Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 13, 2019, 11:17 PM
    Lesbian or straight or bi
    I haven't had a relationship for nearly a year now and I have had two bad relationships in my life and Iím thinking Iím probley gay as I havenít had much luck With men in the past and I donít have any sexual feelings at all towards women never dated one either . And donít want too i want to stop feeling this way This has happened before then I got over it men have not treated me good in the past . I havenít had a decent man in my life Always go for the wrong ones. I. Donít always feel this way itís just sometimes .
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,137, Reputation: 10852
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    #2

    Sep 14, 2019, 05:14 AM
    Looking for love in all the wrong places is common with many of us and of course we get burned. They NEED to just have someone to be close to often shuts off our common sense, and blinds us to the red flags we may see, but ignore. Maybe that's something to examine BEFORE you go experimenting with the same sex as you already acknowledge your choices in men were bad to begin with. Perhaps you jumped in to fast just based on feelings or high hopes? I don't really know the why of it all, but you are in a big group of us with many failed relationships before we have a good or decent one.

    Maybe the focus should just be more on you and building a life that you enjoy with friends and activities that you enjoy, without a relationship per say, but fun dates and take some time to check things out before you give your heart away. I don't know how old you are but what's the hurry just to have someone anyway. I'd love to hear that part of the story, or if you are just basing your happiness on having a decent man. Why do I suspect that sex and love are confused here, so when the lust wears off there is nothing left? Sometimes we do blame being hurt on the ones we choose, and ignore our part in it, so how have they hurt you is the question, if you would care to share.

    Never the less my suggestion is slowdown and see who it is you give your heart to. I mean seems kind of illogical to switch sex partners because of bad choices, or failure to click with certain men so far. Seems more rational to learn from the past experience and do better next time doesn't it?

    So do you jump in really fast following intense feelings, or are your choices really bad guys?

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