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    ghandi500's Avatar
    ghandi500 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Dec 30, 2007, 07:44 AM
    Girlfriend no longer wants to have sex after becoming pregnant
    Hi all.

    My girlfriend of over a year recently became pregnant unexpectedly, she is currently about 2 months pregnant and since finding out has had no interest in sex, I realise that pregnancy can mess with her hormones and make her not in the mood for sex, but its now getting to the point where I can't even touch her at all, like holding her hand, rubbing her back (her favorite thing in the world) and I can't talk to her about it, cause she just ignores the subject and either stops talking to me or talks about something else.

    Any advice on getting her to at least talk about it? I'd feel much better if she would actually talk to me instead of just being distant and not really caring whether I'm near her or not.

    Thanks.
    Starrviolet's Avatar
    Starrviolet Posts: 64, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Dec 30, 2007, 09:11 AM
    The only thing I can say is please be understanding of this:) I know it's hard, but you have to realize all her body is trying to do right now to prepare for the baby. She is in the first trimester and that is when the most of the hormonal changes take place, making her not want to have sex and like her, some don't want to be touched. That's normal. I was the same way the first three months.. I lost total interest in it. It seemed to me that after I got out of the first tri, I was more open to affection from my husband. Just be patient, it's only temporary! Good luck with the baby:)
    kliem's Avatar
    kliem Posts: 18, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Dec 30, 2007, 12:17 PM
    I agree with Starviolet. In addition, is it possible that she is currently suffering from emotional distraught? Perhaps, she wants some assurance from you that you want to marry her; to take responsibility to be the father of the baby; afraid of what her parents will think; and perhaps many more that you might want to bring them up to make her at ease, and hopefully, her sex life will come back to normal. Please remember sexual intercourse between lovers involves lots of tendering loving care.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #4

    Dec 30, 2007, 01:31 PM
    Pregnant women feel a lot more secure and happy deep down when they are married.

    Her actions indicate to me that she is hostile to you.
    brown_eyes_3546's Avatar
    brown_eyes_3546 Posts: 103, Reputation: 5
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    #5

    Dec 31, 2007, 02:55 AM
    Don't fret... I did that to my boyfriend. The unexpected pregnancy is a shock and if your girlfriend is anything like my 5 pregnant friends and myself she is worried about the baby's health and the other things mentioned above. I am four months and me and my boyfriend are just now having sex again. I just asked him what the best advice is to give you and he says: "obey her every command and adapt to what she wants be it make you cook at 2:00 in the morning or whatever it is get up help her and do it. then you will understand what her body is doing and how stressful it may be."

    <i am laughing... I really do make him fix me something to eat at 2:00 everymorning because I can't cook but he gets out of bed for me to make sure I get what I want to eat> and honestly he is right. Until I felt his full apreciation of what was going on inside my body and how crazy my emotions were I wanted nothing to do with him sexually.

    Once I felt that I had his support I began to want to have a relationship. It may be the mothers intuition making sure that the father is able to handle the baby or w/e but you are not alone and my boyfriend says that "videos" were his way to get me back into the mood because I would get jelous because he had his attention on another girl. It makes us pregnant ladies realize that the guys have needs too although ours may be the most important we still want our man to be happy.
    Malu's Avatar
    Malu Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Dec 31, 2007, 07:38 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ghandi500
    Hi all.

    My girlfriend of over a year recently became pregnant unexpectedly, she is currently about 2 months pregnant and since finding out has had no interest in sex, I realise that pregnancy can mess with her hormones and make her not in the mood for sex, but its now getting to the point where I can't even touch her at all, like holding her hand, rubbing her back (her favorite thing in the world) and I can't talk to her about it, cause she just ignores the subject and either stops talking to me or talks about something else.

    Any advice on getting her to at least talk about it? I'd feel much better if she would actually talk to me instead of just being distant and not really caring whether I'm near her or not.

    Thanks.
    A lot goes on in a persons mind and now one more thing a girl has to except the fact that she has to carry the burden and wonders if her boyfriend will be supportive. Girls go through mood swings when they are pregnant. Just being near by and catering to her will make her feel wanted and not alone. A lot goes through a persons mind and when others feed wrong information more so one has to be understanding and if she feel wanted she will come around and be more secure around you. Next question will he settle down or just want a good time, so a lot is going on in one's head and only time can tell.

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