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skybluesky · Feb 12, 2012, 03:30 PM

I'm 18 years old and have been suffering from depression since I was a little kid. My mother is an alcoholic, and my siblings and I have always been neglected. For two years my sister and I lived in our currently house alone, starting when we were 13 and 15 respectively. Our mother's back now, but I can't deal with my depression while I'm still living with her. I'm legally an adult, but I am in no way prepared for the adult world. Is there any way to find myself a family that wants me?

Synnen · Feb 12, 2012, 04:51 PM

I'm sorry, but most people looking to adopt are looking for small children.

Once you are an adult, there are various social services that you can seek for yourself, and of course you can choose friends that help you in life.

I suggest you contact your local Lutheran Social Services or Catholic Social Services and ask if they have any programs that can help you. You can also reach out to your pastor/priest/rabbi for assistance.

Fr_Chuck · Feb 12, 2012, 04:52 PM

Sorry not really at 18 you don't get adopted, you get friends or support groups or a friends family that will give you support.

But sorry you are most likely more prepared to be on your own, than someone who was babied with a mom at home. You had to grow up tough and hard without a mom at home.

skybluesky · Feb 13, 2012, 06:03 AM

Actually, I -can- legally be adopted. I'm just wondering how I might find such a family, if one were to want me.

Synnen · Feb 13, 2012, 10:03 AM

Yes, you can be. No one said you couldn't.

However, I'm a birthmother and I've worked with the adoption world for 20 years. I've also dealt with infertility and looked into adopting.

The people that want to adopt a stranger are looking for a CHILD, not an adult. Adult adoptions generally only happen between people who already know each other well and already have the parent-child bond in place and want to formalize it for legal reasons.

I would, quite frankly, immediately distrust a stranger who wanted to adopt you as an adult--primarily because there is no good reason to do so. You can get the support you need through other means when you are an adult, so there is no reason for adoption other than to cement an already existing bond.