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    clha's Avatar
    clha Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 13, 2006, 04:37 AM
    Find my biological mother
    My name is Claus Hanke living in Denmark. My adopted son Thomas (born March 15, 1968) wants to find his biological parents, prefarably his biological mother. He has given me the authority to conduct this search. From his early childhood he has known, that he was adopted. Thomas is doing well in society, and is at present a hotel director in Copenhagen. He is expecting his first child.

    We have his original birth certificate, which states, that he is born by his biological mother Lynn Kay Albright (age 17, caucasian, then living at 2985 Glenmanor, Los Angeles) at Behrens Memorial Hospital (now Verdugo Hills Hospital) in Glendale, California. We also are in possession of the adoption paper, which confirms, that attorney for us was Harold L. Myers, and the adoption was granted June 25, 1968 by Judge Lester E. Olson, Superior Court of the State of California for the County of Los Angeles.

    We have at the time of birth been told, that Lynn lived by her grandparents on the above address at least in the period of pregnancy, and that she has greek ancestors. We do not remember, who told us that. We know nothing about the father, and we do not know, where Thomas was conceived.

    We are aware, that his biological parents might not want to see Thomas, because their present lives may be affected seriously, if they still want to hide, that there was a birth. An investigation must therefore be discrete, until the investigator finds out, that the birth is known by Lynn's environments, and that Lynn is prepared to see her biological son (may be she even dos'nt know, whether it was a girl or a boy). The same view goes for the biological father.

    Do you know, whether the last situation appears very often? Modern view of unexpected births have widened quite a lot since 1968. We incline to the opinion, that an open frank letter to the last residence of Lynn would be a starting point for the investigation. This we can do ourselves.

    Sincerely Claus Hanke, Axel Juelsalle 42, DK-2750 Ballerup
    RickJ's Avatar
    RickJ Posts: 7,762, Reputation: 864
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    #2

    Mar 13, 2006, 04:51 AM
    You are right to be sensitive to Lynn's feelings on this. If she is found, a letter to her would be in order. Give her the opportunity to either ignore it or contact you... but don't feel too bad if she does not return the letter.

    Research of this sort is a common activity of mine. I'll do a little searching for you.

    Yes, a letter to the current owner or occupant of the LA address is a good start... but you can dig a bit deeper on that end of it.

    Property ownership info is public info... so call the county Tax Assessor to find out who owns the property and how long they've owned it.

    You can also try the local library to see if a reference person will look up the address in a criss cross directory for you so that you can also contact the neighbors to ask them if they know anything about the Albright's.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #3

    Mar 13, 2006, 08:21 AM
    Please Google Adoption search or similar terms. There is a wealth of information to aid in an adoptees search for their biological parents. There are some clearing houses where adoptees and biological parents can list themselves. That would be my suggestion as a first step. The next would be to attempt to contact the attorney who handled the adoption.

    I would NOT attempt any direct contact to the birth mother until you have exhausted some of the other avenues. Any attempt to contact her until you determine her feelings on the issue, should be discreet and private.
    fairy-dust's Avatar
    fairy-dust Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    May 25, 2006, 09:18 AM
    Hi this mite not be much help as you don't live in england but this is how I found my bio mum well I found an address for her or where she is living at the present any way I am sure if you go on this site and email them they could help you to start looking tell you how to go about it or whatever you need to know After Adoption Home Page
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #5

    May 25, 2006, 09:25 AM
    I agree it is a sensitive subject to contact the birth mother. My sister-in-law was adopted in Germany and recently found her birth mother. The BM did not want anything to do with my sister-in-law and she was very hurt. She did find that she has 2 sisters, but only 1 sister wants any contact. The fact that the BM wants no contact with my sister-in-law has been quite damaging to her self-esteem. So be careful how you go about this.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #6

    May 25, 2006, 10:07 AM
    An adoptee's search for their birth parent is a potential mine field. There are so many people who may be impacted adversely by such a search. The adoptive parents may be hurt in feeling they haven't been enough of a parent. The birth family may be hurt by an intrusion in their lives.

    Fortunately, we live in an age where its possible to match up people who WANT to be matched up. The Internet has several places where people can register and then be matched up. In such a case both parties are agreeable to the reunion.

    But, In my opinion, unless BOTH parties are agreeable, neither party has the right to intrude on the other.

    If I were an adoptee whose birth parent did not want to contact me, I would understand. Givng a child up for adoption is one of the most unselfish acts, one of the greatest and bravest acts of love I can think of. I can, completely understand not wanting to open up the pain of such memories. I wouldn't consider it a slight against the adoptee, but a need on the Biological parents needs and respect those needs.

    J9, I would say to your sis-in-law that its not about her and it shouldn't affect her self-esteem in any way. This is about the other families and their needs for closure.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #7

    May 25, 2006, 10:13 AM
    Scott, I agree with you about the sis-in-law. I believe there were issues with her before the search began that brought out the feelings she is now experiencing.

    And, yes adoption is by far the most unselfsh acts and bravest acts of love I can think of too.

    I tried to comment, but got the pop-up again.

    You made great points here.

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