When I start drinking I can not quit. I need help.

This is something you should discuss with your doctor. There are many treatment facilities all over the world for alcohol addiction. If you can't stop on your own you can receive specialized care in those facilities. It's really not something anyone can do online.

Start with your doctor, go from there, and good luck.

Check out Alcoholics Anonymous in your city.

I did go for everything and did not drink for one year. Just one beer trigger the episode I thought I am doing great and very happy but now very depressed and hard to come out. I am trying to come out myself so I can built confidence.

Check out Alcoholics Anonymous in your area. They can help you out of this funk.

I went regularly AA meetings. I went rehab as well. I thought I am doing OK and have one beer at work party. This time I want to come out myself. Yet I am not able to do so. I hope soon.

Why did you stop going to AA? Obviously it helped. You said you want to "come out" yourself, but you can't. That should tell you that you can't handle this yourself. So go to an AA meeting, get the support you need.

I can not go for AA because I am drinking.

I am hoping anyone like my condition help me.

You simply can never have that one beer. Until you accept that and move on, you will not recover. I don't know your age but you are setting yourself up for a short life. Go back where you can get proper assistance. Nobody else can do it for you.

If you have been sober for a year and then one beer sent you backwards a couple of steps, why are you not willing to go back to AA? You slipped up. Most people do. You admit it and start over. You ask for help from your sponsor and the group just like you are here asking for help.

Unless AA has changed since other people I know have gone to meetings, most people there have fallen off the wagon many times. There isn't supposed to be shame if you fall. There is supposed to be understanding and a hand to help you back up. Do you need to try a different location/group? Is this group more judgmental than many others? Did you like the people there and don't want to disappoint them?

Are you afraid to go back because you had a fall or because you want to use that fall as an excuse? Are you staying away from them to punish yourself?

Smearcase thanks for reply and good advice. I will get help to stop this but yet I want to quit myself. So I can built my confidence. I am 34 years old. My parents and brother sister helping me.


Cat 1864 thanks for concern. AA meetings are available and that are in University. Person can not attend under alcohol influence.

You are really going to quit? When will this happen? You do realize that is the height of arrogance and even selfishness, don't you, thinking you can do this yourself. My in laws sadly and even angrily watched their stubborn alcoholic aunts and uncles and cousins die in drunken car accidents, fails down stairs, liver diseases, even suicides.

Even if you are still drinking, go to AA. Please!

You stopped for a year, now stop again.

Of course you can go to AA, they will help you stop.
Your mistake was to take that first drink after a year.

WHY?

Many of us, and I am one also, it is one day at a time. You do not worry about this week, right now, you worry about this hour, then this afternoon, then this evening. Maybe in a few weeks, you worry about tomorrow.

Each day, you take it, just that day. Then the days add up. But it never stops, you can not just do that "one drink"

Your relatives are helping you quit, but you are still drinking and can't even show your face around AA? Wake up your way ain't getting it done. Get yourself to a meeting and keep your mouth shut and ears open. Look around, pick somebody, and ask them to sponsor you. Guide you through the 12 steps. Being sober is a way of life, not an event. Alcoholism is a disease from which there is no cure and maintenance is EVERT day. Support and guidance through good orderly direction is the whole point.

You slipped off the wagon because you thought you were cured, but you stay off because the old thinking of guilt and shame and failure stop you from trying. Be a shame if that keeps you from trying again to get back on the wagon and doing better. But its your choice. Wallow in your own self pity, or get back to the tables. The easy softer way never works, nor do excuses, so get back to the table and do what got you that year of sobriety. Use your sponsor. That's what he is there for.

Good luck.

It is good that they are helping you. But they can not be your sole means of support. If they are that puts a huge burden on them and strains the relationships.

If you can't leave a bottle alone long enough to go to a meeting then you have a larger problem than you think you do. You are making excuses and rationalizations. How many of these 'bargains' were you making a year ago before you got help?

Pick up the phone and call your sponsor. Go to an earlier meeting before you have a drink. If need be, find one that meets at five in the morning. Get out of bed and go to the meeting instead of going for a drink.

No more excuses.

Everyone thanks showing so much concern. I am struggling but I do not drink today I hope.

Find a meeting, get to it, go early, stay late.

Hope is good. But be proactive.

Go to a meeting.

I quit drinking and after did not touch. I feel very happy when I do not drink. Thanks everyone for help.

Hi Bal15, it's been 2 months since your last posting. Are you okay and still sober?

I agree with a lot of what was posted already and thanks to everyone for helping him out with his question.

I have known people who attended AA somewhat under the influence and I've never seen anyone kicked out of a meeting because of it. As long as they are not falling down drunk or disruptive, (and have a desire to stop drinking), they are welcome to attend the meeting. People in AA understand that someone who wants to stop may not be able to until they get help with it. Look at it this way: If you break your arm, do you feel like you have to let it heal before you go see the doctor? Of course not! Just like at a hospital, members of Alcoholics Anonymous deal with "sick" people on a daily basis. We are just dealing with the illness of alcoholism instead of other medical conditions.

If you've gone back to drinking and can't stop, a short-term stay in a detox ward / hospital might be necessary. From my understanding, detox from Alcohol is actually a lot more dangerous than from many hard drugs. Medical supervision is sometimes advisable.

Treatment centers are great (I've been to several myself) but they mostly just get you back on track and send you to Alcoholics Anonymous, which you can do without an expensive, lengthy stay if you're dedicated to sobriety. However, they will also assess you for the need for other types of treatment that even the Big Book of AA references such as seeing a psychiatrist or counselor for treatment of depression, bi-polar, or other psychological illnesses that often accompany addiction.

Going to AA meetings *A LOT* in early sobriety can be very helpful. Studies in successful sobriety have found that going to daily meeting for at least three months after treatment or new sobriety (90 meetings in 90 days or "90-in-90" as it is called) is one of several factors that greatly improve someone's odds of long-term sobriety. I am fortunate to live in an area with many meetings and some groups offer three or four per day or more. I have known people who almost lived all their early sober life at their meetings just to have a "safe" supportive place to go, and that can help bridge the gap. But long-term, you have to learn to balance AA with returning to a normal life. That takes time.

I need to make a major point. Going to AA meetings by itself is ****NOT**** what AA is all about!! The meetings are a great support system but they are simply the "FELLOWSHIP" aspect of AA. The ****REAL**** part of AA is ****WORKING THE 12-STEPS WITH A GOOD SPONSOR****!! That is the "PROGRAM" of AA that leads to long-term recovery if done correctly... to include complete HONESTY - OPENMINDEDNESS - and WILLINGNESS. Those are the keys to a successful working of the steps, as referenced in the Big Book Appendix II (The Spiritual Experience).

The "Fellowship" offers hope and support that non-alcoholic family members cannot provide. They may WANT to help but they do not understand the alcoholic or his disease well enough to be the sole support system. An alcoholic needs other alcoholics in recovery to find his way out of addiction. But true recovery means working those steps, incorporating the spiritual tools and principles into your life, deepening your spiritual relationship with your Higher Power, and carrying the message by helping other alcoholics yourself as you have been helped.

Best wishes in your recovery!